I’m a big proponent of Social Media. The various forums give us a variety of ways to communicate, connect and learn from each other. It can be overwhelming at times because it comes at us from every angle and during every moment of the day.
What intrigues me though is how people approach Social Media. I find that most people present ideas, opinions and perspectives that I would not have necessarily come up with myself. I enjoy looking at the material I see as a way to build the amount of knowledge that we can use.
One thing that is challenging in how people use Social Media is when people are critical. Not in the way of poking at the status quo, but in the way where their style, or form of sharing. is to tear everything down. There are no areas that are off limits and the more critical the better. Very few solutions are offered and it is really disheartening when I see the tone of blogs tear people down.
I value hearing from others who don’t look at things the way I do. The fact is this happens every single day all around me. I don’t need Social Media to get that. I do think that Social Media has a “critical” feel to it because we spend the majority of our days being critical of each other and the experiences we have. This isn’t to point fingers. It’s an observation and one I’m guilty of as well.
It’s exhausting and not productive. When you think that you’re spending so much time being critical when you could take a different approach. I heard a piece of advice this week that hit me directly and made me want to change. Here it is . . .
Be a student and not a critic.
The thought is to learn from others instead of critiquing what they say, or who they are. This may seem passive, but I don’t think so. Hearing other’s points of view does not necessarily mean you agree with them. However, it also doesn’t mean that you tear what they say apart only because it differs from your beliefs.
This is essential in HR. One of the biggest roles you have on a daily basis is being a counselor. You are in a position where you hear the good, the bad and the ugly of people’s lives. If you take the posture of being critical, you will always see the dark side of what you’re facing. You can’t help it because you assume that the worst will surely occur.
You have a choice. You can listen, synthesize and respond to people, or you can critique, judge and react. This is true for all people in organizations and in life. I know that even in writing this people will be critics. My choice is to be the student.
I’d rather learn from you, get to know you and have a relationship with you. Even though our thoughts and opinions may differ, I can still learn. This week I ask you to stop being a critic, and start being a student.
I shared an article on my Facebook wall a few years ago, and although I no longer remember what the article was about, I remember 2 people commenting and then arguing over their personal beliefs – on my wall. It created negativity and anxiety in my space when I wanted positivity. Another person put an end to it when she said to them, “Let’s keep Facebook for friends, not fighting.”
I was grateful for her comment! I am with you, Steve. We can all be students and learn so much from each other. We grow and build so much good through that, rather than by tearing each other down.
This post reminds me of the “Daring Greatly” quote “It’s not the critic who counts…” by Theodore Roosevelt.
Social media allows one “sink time” to let an idea sink in before developing a response. Developing a thoughtful response is time consuming which makes me appreciate them even more.
For me this comes back to the old Theory Y and Theory X. Do you believe people are trying to do their best or do you believe are trying to do their worst. I choose to believe people are trying to do their best every day.