‘CIPD’ Articles at Everyday People, Page 2

Not Sure What to Say

It’s rare that I don’t have words readily available to type and share. I have been struggling with all of the unrest happening around the country and in my city. I wanted to say something, and I’ve been apprehensive for a few reasons. First of all, I don’t want to make a statement that would be taken out of context which is easy to have done with anything that is but a snapshot of words in time. Secondly, writing about a racial issue when I’m a white man makes me anxious as well. I don’t want my words to be taken in a way that lessens or marginalizes anyone. However, I needed to say something.

I recently read that in a time of crisis, people of courage take a stand. I choose to step in on this with grace and a yearning to understand. Along with everyone else, I hear people screaming for people to pick a side and be held “accountable.” In fact, I’ve had friends cast their sentiments and shame on me for not instantly, and emotionally, respond to all that’s happening. I realize that I’m a visible person in the world of HR, and I choose to be one on purpose. With that, I don’t feel you can only comment on all that’s good, but you should also respond when things are challenging and uncomfortable.

I ache for what is happening. I truly do. I don’t pretend that I have the same background, fear and anger that many do because my life has not been made up of the same experiences. I understand that I am treated differently because I am white and not black. I don’t agree with it and I never have. To me, I am disheartened because people have lost their lives. There are families who have lost those dear to them forever when it didn’t need to happen, and we all know that in a moment a bad decision can be made that will change the course of a person’s life forever.

The country has been filled with angst, emotion and frustration for some time. All that has been happening with the pandemic, endless political rhetoric and a constant focus on all that’s “wrong” with our existence has consumed the majority of our thoughts and conversations. I’ve seen injustice occur when a spark is lit and the bucket of emotions unleashes. It’s honestly a cycle we refuse to address and break from.

And, here’s where I get stuck for words . . .

You see, I don’t dare be prescriptive or should that “this” action should happen or “that” person should be addressed. That’s only because there are far too many of us who need to act and speak up. It’s not only the people involved in the loss of life.

I’ve seen many contacts and friends who are beside themselves and have very publicly shouted that they’re getting off social media because they just can’t handle it anymore. I’m concerned when people step away only because it can lead to a trap of isolation, intimidation and indifference. I would hope there’s a chance and a window to engage, understand and have dialogue even when emotions are running high.

This past weekend, I was in Indianapolis with my wife visiting our daughter. As we were walking through the neighborhoods around Mass Ave., I saw this piece of art which captured what I can do during this time. It’s a crossing sign that has two alternative messages on it versus the traditional Walk/Don’t Walk. It shows “Don’t Care/Care” and the button below says, “Push button to change.” As we came up on the sign, it was on the blue light saying, “Don’t Care,” and we pushed the button to make the sign express “Care.”

Now, I know this is an analogy and just a visual cue. However, I believe that in all this unrest what I can do more than ever is care. I choose to do that by reaching out to friends who I know are angry and fearful. I’ve had conversations already and plan to reach out to others to check in. I’ve asked for context and not “why” when we’ve talked. I want them to know that I’m here for them no matter what.

That may seem minor and not doing “enough” in the eyes of many. What you need to understand though is that I have lived my life with the belief and behavior of meeting you WHERE you are and for WHO you are in every aspect of your life. While the world keeps ripping itself apart over ignorant words, self-aggrandizing tweets, and a cult of personality, I choose to engage people as humans, and I will continue to do so.

I value our differences and see them as strengths and attributes that make you a wonderful person worth engaging and knowing. I refuse to be someone who is called upon to only know others if I have to compartmentalize, label, judge, marginalize or generalize them.

I care about people and I ache that once again race has become something that divides us. I want to see that change and I am going to do that one person at a time. It’s been said for centuries that “actions speak louder than words.” I hope you are reflecting on how you can genuinely express care for people for who they are and where they are in life. To me this is basic and foundational.

In getting ready to write this, I did find some words that captured my heart well from of all places – Nike. Take a look and let’s do all we can to bring people together and move forward.

Who You Are to Me

Recently, I’ve noticed an unfortunate malaise when it comes to being active on social media. It seems that you can’t post anything without someone making a comment to the contrary. It doesn’t matter what the subject matter is or the opinion that was shared. If you shared that you were, “having a great day with your family and enjoying the beautiful weather and the blue skies”, inevitabily someone would say something like, “well it’s raining here.”

What has happened? Why has it become so prevalent to make sure that no comment is supported, but we make sure it is criticized? I know some dear friends who even say things like, “Well, life just can’t be that good. Look at how their picture is perfect . . .”

I understand that we are going through a difficult time globally. This is a first for many because now this situation affects us personally. We tend to forget, or not know, that challenges exist everywhere and every day. They may be visible and get news coverage if they’re horrific enough because that is what we seem to thrive on. However, many people are facing challenges which are not visible to others. You may never know the extent of what they’re going through.

Now, as a realistic optimist myself, I don’t find myself stuck in dark places often. It happens, but I try my best to focus on those areas of my life where I have the most interaction including my faith, my family and my friends. I even make sure that this is how I view my interactions on social media. I would much rather see the light of recognition and acknowledgement be on others and their good work.

Recently, a dear friend of mine, broke through the veil of negativity which seems to try and continue to divide us with a simple postcard. The message on the front instantly captured my attention. It said – “Who You Are to Me.” I had no idea who it was from or why I had received it. I hastily flipped it over eager to read if there was another message. It was a simple message just as the one on the front. At the top I read, “5 words I’d use to describe you” and there were five numbers with lines next to each number. Then, my friend, wrote five descriptive words to fill the card. She then signed it, “Laurie.”

The words she used were personal, heartfelt and meaningful. I’m sharing them just so you get the feel of how touching this act was. The words were: “Trailblazer, Leader, Community builder, Compassionate communicator and Friend.”

I read the card over and over. I was floored that this is how she viewed me. We have been friends with her for several years. kI always enjoy when we chat or see each other. Honestly, this piece of mail was such a perfect ray of light and a reminder that personalized encouragement leaves a long-term and significant mark.

I would love to see everyone, especially those in HR, practice this in person and on social media. Think how much more positive your daily activities would be knowing who you are to somebody else !! We have no problem expressing feelings which divide us. Let’s turn that around and let those who are in our lives know how much they matter. Laurie did this with a 50 cent stamp and five words.

This week pick three people who positively make a difference in your life, and the lives of others, and tell them how much they mean to you. Use a method like this one and share five descriptive words to let them know how you feel. Make it personal. Do it because you want to and not because it’s a task.

I will be doing this going forward and on purpose. I want to take the opportunity to shed light on others and break through the darkness. I want to see everyone lifted up as we move forward. It costs you nothing to share what’s on your heart, but it may be the one piece of encouragement that someone needed at just the right time !!

Our Time is Now !!

Can you feel and see the rumblings of the next phase of the COVID-19 crisis on the horizon? We’ve been in a mix of constant change, uncertainty and regulatory direction. People are getting antsy. People are getting even more expressive and emotional. The feeling isn’t all good either. With the inevitable lifting of restrictions, people are voicing their opinions on timing, the extent of movement and political posturing is growing. To be honest, this next phase can be almost as unsettling as the front part of this time in our history.

We were asked to take drastic and immediate action when this all started, and now we’re asked to slowly return to . . . normal. Let’s be clear – normal isn’t going to be what it was. It just isn’t, and it shouldn’t be !!

I am so pleased that HR has stepped up and into leadership during the crisis. It has been long overdue. There are several blogs which have featured senior HR leaders and how they’ve been the voice of strategy, response and direction. It is unfortunate that we were only looked to as leaders because potential tragedy loomed in organizations and workplaces. I don’t want to take away from any of the great work that has been done to date in the least. The circumstances we find ourselves in have allowed HR to flex their muscles and show how a people-centric approach was needed in our companies. Because, like most issues in the workplace, the center of them is people. It always has been . . . and always will be.

People are now seeing HR as it should be seen. This isn’t a call to take advantage of a crisis. It’s a chance for us to step into leadership because that is the vantage point from which HR operates best.

My hope is that we don’t return to any semblance of normality as HR practitioners. We can’t step away from being leaders. We should take up the same mantle we’ve assumed during this time of crisis and be those who help organizations perform through its people. We need to be present and visible from now on and not shrink back to our places of feeling we’re merely a support function.

Our time is now !!

I mean this with every inch of my being. I am calling out and throwing down the gauntlet to my peers to continue leading in every facet of your work. There is no reason for us to be on the sidelines or in the shadows. We need to break from the traditional pattern of yearning and hope that “one day” we’ll be called upon. That day has arrived. The opportunity which lies before us is wide open and can be defined by us through a continued movement which we are currently facing.

It’s intriguing to me that people are pushing against the boundaries of the restrictions we’ve been placed in to keep us safe. They’re looking for the ability to move around, interact and return to work. There is a palpable energy that is about to be unleashed. We should ride that train of emotion and stop our continued systems of confinement and restriction in HR.

People have been working from home and redefining productivity, innovation, collaboration and connection. So, why would we push for people to get back into their place in line? This is a time for us to unleash the talent which people possess and expect them to continue to produce, develop and grow !!

It’s also time for us to embrace the skill of being agile and adaptable. We were forced into this a few weeks ago, but now we can continue to practice agility and adaptablity !! My good friend Paul Hebert recently wrote a post on HR Examiner asking – “Can HR do their future job?” My answer is a resounding, “YES !!!” There’s absolutely no reason to seek normality. It’s our time to launch forward and construct the new workplace, create the new expectations of performance plus encourage the development of talent throughout the organization.

I plan to move forward. Will you go with me ?? My hope is that we continue to lead, grow and thrive personally, professionally as a global HR community.

Our time is now !!

Praise You !!

This weekend my wife and I took a road trip. We did it for two reasons. One was to get out of the house and just see the world around us. She noted as we were driving that she hadn’t left the house except to go to the grocery store for a month. I was glad I could get her out for a drive. The second reason was more important to be honest. Our daughter lives in Indianapolis and we live in Greater Cincinnati. We’re about two hours from each other. She agreed to meet us halfway to have lunch in a parking lot.

We drove to Batesville, Indiana and met at the LaRosa’s Pizzeria. Yes, it’s one of the locations of the company where I work and it’s also a fave for our family. I was able to run in and check on our Team Members, and get some great food to have brought out to our cars. We never left our car to get close to our daughter because we wanted to maintain social distance and she also works in healthcare. She’s on the front line working with people who are recovering from COVID-19 as an occupational therapist.

It was so great to see her in person !! We’ve been having video chats with both of our kids because we all live in different parts of the country, and we want to stay as safe as possible. We spent an hour and a half talking, checking on her and listening to real world stories of lives being affected. We asked about her co-workers and many of her closest friends who are also in healthcare at various hospitals.

I made sure to do one more thing while I had Melanie “close” to me. I thanked her for all she’s doing. I told her how proud her mother and I were of her going into work everyday during this turbulent time. She appreciated it and said, “Dad, this is where I should be.” (Yes, I got weepy.)

I am so pleased with how people are praising those who are working in all types of industries to help us cope with all that’s going on. People are actually thanking folks they typically ignore. It’s needed now AND into the future !!

You see, we tend to react at heightened levels when situations directly affect us. We’re taking time to thank healthcare workers and deeming them as heroic (which is true !!) We’re thanking those working in restaurants, grocery stores, sanitation, emergency services, education, etc. It’s wonderful to see and it’s also overdue.

We should be grateful and appreciative of every person for the job they do. It shouldn’t occur only because we’re in the thick of a crisis. As the countries around the world are now getting agitated and impatient about not being able to break out of isolation, I’m concerned that when we go back to our normal patterns, this outward level of praise will subside. And, it will subside quickly.

I’m concerned we’ll fall back into our patterns of complaining about our commutes, the co-worker we’ll talk “about” but not to, as well as the things about our job we don’t enjoy. Yes, we want to get back to work and I hope it happens soon as well as safely. The question is – Will we relapse?

You see, when you see parents with kids giving praise is easy. We encourage our kids at every step of any activity. We do this because we want them to respond and understand they’re learning skills and reaching accomplishments. As we grow older, we forsake that pattern and expect people to “get to work” and “stay focused.” Our days are filled with far more converstations that tear people down, and we focus on what isn’t being done versus anything that is being accomplished.

This tidal wave of praise needs to become our norm in every workplace, every industry, every school and every family !! I know that’s a bold ambition, but you have to understand the power of praising others. I heard a person describe praise as “accelerated, amplified gratitude.” How cool is that ??

I am grateful for my daughter and for every person who is working at this difficult and uncertain time. My plan though is to continue to praise everyone for all they do every day. Every. Day. I encourage you to do the same. Let’s not relapse ever again. Value the people in your life for all they do !!

I want to leave you with two reminders going forward. One is the great effort from Workhuman where you can thank healthcare workers. Their effort is called “Thank You Healthcare “. Just click on the title and you can sign up to share some praise and gratitude. Secondly, we all need music to remind us to take action so I leave you with Fatboy Slim . . .

(One thing to note – the people who filmed the video did this as an impromtu flash mob. They’re regular people willing to be bold and express themselves. Note that someone tries to stop them because they’re not acting as they “should” but they aren’t swayed in the least. Enjoy !!)

Do Good. Be Kind.

How are you holding up? It’s a question we should be asking everyone we know. I’m positive I never thought I’d live to see a situation where all of life as we know it was altered in a matter of days. So, how are you holding up?

I think this is more important to know than “how are you doing?” I’m sure even in the midst of all that is occurring we’d give folks a positive nod of “I’m good” whether that was the case or not. I hope you are holding up well even though we are surrounded by stress, anxiety and uncertainty because things seem to still be a bit unknown. There is an overwhelming wave of “information”, but most are starting to get numb to the barrage. We’re all yearning for distractions of some sort.

This Friday, I had one of those needed distractions and it changed me. Literally changed me.

As I ventured out to the end of my suburban driveway to check the mail, I turned around and a pretty substantial box was sitting on my front porch. The deliverer didn’t ring my doorbell or knock on the door to say something had arrived. In today’s climate, that’s very understandable. I was curious because I hadn’t ordered anything. I grabbed it and took it to my kitchen island eager to see what was inside.

When I opened the box, my jaw dropped to the floor. I couldn’t believe all that was waiting inside !! There were two beautiful tie-dye shirts (which only adds to my collection), a mug, a notebook, some stickers, a button to wear and several Smarties candies. It was so cool and I was honestly speechless. Not only was the swag cool, the slogan grabbed me because I knew who it was from.

My friend, Chris Kurtz, started a company called Do Good. Be Kind. I’ve only connected with him, so far, online through Twitter. I was drawn to Chris because of his approach, his message and his general sense of being a positive and encouraging human. He sent me this care package because he thought that I fit his message and vibe as well. To say I was humbled wouldn’t be an accurate enough sentiment.

I instantly went out to the company’s website here and took in every aspect. I was floored to see how their efforts are touching schools, students and businesses. The message of “Do Good. Be Kind.” is not only needed now in a time of crisis, but it’s something we should live daily from now on. Think of it in the perspectives of your life at home, your community and your workplace.

Seriously, what would your company culture and HR look like if you lived the mantra of doing good every day with all of your efforts and interactions? How about if you were kind with every employee including those you find difficult?

Remember this always – HR is the ONLY profession where they get to work with every, single person within the organization.

With that knowledge imagine how fulfilled you, and those with whom you interact, would be because the foundation of your behavior is – Do Good. Be Kind. This next week I want you to go to Chris’ company’s site and look around to see how you can get connected yourself. Check out their incredible story, visit their shop and get some swag yourself that you can both display and share.

I’m grateful for everyone who is in HR and am thankful that we’re peers. Trust me in that I will continue to live this approach myself and know you will thrive if you do as well !!

Getting Together !!

As I write this, the entire world has changed. It’s unprecedented and has caused an environment of isolation in order to hopefully ensure safety in the long-term. Emotions range from anxiety and fear to confidence and hope. The whole situation has caused us to reevaluate how work is done and what we focus on in life in general.

I have to say that in the midst of this challenging time, I love that people are finding ways to get together even though it’s not in person. There are folks having virtual happy hours and coffee clubs. This is so encouraging because I’ve always been someone who believes that we are wired to be connected as people. This is true for everyone.

Recently I joined a Zoom call with a group of friends who happen to also be in HR that have been daily connected for the past 3+ years. We have a GroupMe and talk every day. Every. Day. Even with that, we felt the need to see and hear each other. In moments we were laughing, telling stories and checking in on how we’re responding to everything going on around us. We talked for 1 1/2 hours !! It was magnificent in every possible way. We got to see each other’s houses even though we live all across the country. This made sense to get together because it’s what we’re used to.

Then, yesterday I joined a chat that was predominantly made up of friends I’ve only “met” on social media from the UK. Selena Govier put out a call to have an HR Pub Quiz which she was going to run virtually. So, at 9:00pm GMT the quiz began with five rounds of ten questions. This was great because I got to see and hear the voices of friends I’ve only seen online !! The questions were tough because I’m in the US and don’t have a ton of knowledge of UK only trivia. It didn’t matter one bit because we also laughed and had fun sharing all of the answers. I scored a 22 out of 53 and was pretty geeked about that. Selena plans to have the #HRPubQuiz each week while we’re all at our homes.

Once that wrapped up, another group of HR friends who identify as the #StateLineCrew had a chat as well. They are near the border between Illinois and Wisconsin, and the person putting the call together asked if I could join as a surprise. She also reached out to friends in Virginia and South Dakota to join in. We had another hour of rich conversation, laughter and some commiserating because that was a welcomed relief. It was a great reminder that HR folks don’t have a ton of people they can share with inside their organization because of the nature of the work we do.

No one really knows how long we’ll be apart from each other as this global crisis continues. So, take the time to get together virtually with your family, friends and co-workers. With technology there are no geographic boundaries to stop you. Put together a video chat or use social media forums to connect. Invite others and ask them to join in with you.

This is a time for us to make sure everyone is noticed and included. Having gatherings like this is worth your time because you’ll feel encouraged, connected and know that we’re in this together. Reach out !! I know I will be.

Hornets Nest !!

My wife and I are following a typical pattern that happens once your kids grow up and move out on their own. We’ve been in our home since 1991 and I’m very fond of it. I love the neighborhood, our yard and the house itself. Debbie and I were chatting and she said, “It’s time we either moved and downsized (the typical pattern) or remodel and update.” After some consideration of both options, we chose to remodel.

So, we’re going to update our kitchen and our family room. This is a major undertaking because it means we’ll be “living” in our basement for 6 to 8 weeks IF everything stays on schedule AND there are no surprises. Are you someone who watches the home improvement shows on HGTV? We are. Now, I know that it’s television and I’m sure things are staged and filmed in such a way to keep your attention, but it seems that some unknown challenge pops up that no one expected.

This past Saturday, we had our contractor start the work at hand by tearing down the drywall ceiling in our kitchen. Our house was built in 1977 and there are many lingering and dated features such as a stamped ceiling. The two young men made quick work of their task and had the ceiling down and cleaned up in about two hours. When they finished, their dad who leads this family owned business, shared with me what they found.

The ceiling is filled with HVAC ducts, various pipes for plumbing and electrical components. We’re trying to see if we can relocate things to get the ceiling raised to match the rest of the house. As he was walking me through everything, he casually remarked, “Oh yeah, you have a large dormant hornets nest that we found in the soffit.” He, and the boys, didn’t seem fazed in the least. I’m sure they’ve seen all types of things. This was just like the HGTV shows !!

As with most things, finding the hidden hornets nest, reminded me of HR. Based on the size of what was uncovered, the hornets have been nestled in our wall for quite some time. We never have seen any hornets in the house or flying around. That didn’t make the discovery any less disturbing though.

In HR we have similar experiences. Hornets nests are well hidden and disguised within the mix of work environments. You may hear the buzz of something going on, but you’re not sure where the nest exists. A hornet or two may escape and sting you, but you don’t think a bigger problem could be present. When you do find the nest, chances are a swarm happens and a full-on attack occurs !! This isn’t good because your natural reaction is to overreact just to get the hornets off you. This is when senseless knee jerk policies and programs come to life.

You can help prevent the construction of hornets nests by two actions that may seem simple. They are, but the practice is not as easy.

Be Out with Your Employees

This isn’t “new”, but we find more excuses to avoid getting out among our people than we do in putting in intentional time to do this. The more you are out with the “hornets”, the more you’ll be in the know. People will be less likely to sting others when they know their HR person genuinely wants to know who they are and what’s going on in their lives. Stop feeling you are handcuffed by your work. People need to be your focus all the time, not in just reacting to situations.

Listen to Hear, Not to Solve

We are impatient. It doesn’t matter what role you fill or level in which you work. There is an invisible pull of time that keeps us from having meaningful conversations with others. Once we talk to people we tend to come up with a solution in about three words before any full message is even communicated. The majority of people just want to be heard. That’s all. They’re not looking for you to solve or fix them. Taking this approach will relieve so many potential nesting activities that it’s worth trying. You’ll be pleased when you do !!

So, I’m calling a professional exterminator to come to my house to remove our nest. He is sure to have expertise I don’t. Hopefully, he’ll also be able to find the source of where the critters came in my house. I’m hoping we don’t encounter any more surprises during our remodel. We’ll have to wait and see !!

The Music in You !!

This past weekend my wife and I were invited to a friend’s house. We’ve known this family for 20+ years and our children grew up together. It’s not uncommon for all of us to see each other from time to time, but this was a momentous occasion. Their oldest son, DJ, is a junior at Miami University majoring in Piano Performance. We were invited to come over to see a preview of his junior recital.

I was so geeked to be able to attend because I knew he had been working very hard to get ready for this show. This preview would give us a glimpse of his real performance that will occur next week. As we entered their house, we were given a program DJ had composed sharing his theme of the recital and the pieces he’d be playing. The theme is “In der Nacht” (At night) and had pieces from Johann Sebastian Bach, Sergei Prokofiev, Ludwig van Beethoven and Robert Schumann. The house was filled with family and friends who caught up on life, shared stories and our anticipation of the in-house concert we were about to witness.

We all took a seat around a well-worn grand piano which engulfs the family room. As DJ came into the room, he set up a camera to videotape his performance and the room fell silent as he addressed us. He told us the inspiration of his recital theme and why he chose each musical piece. He encouraged us to read the descriptions he had written so we could try to hear the music as he did with its variation of emotion and the “stories” they each told. After he set the stage for his performance, he turned toward the keyboard, took a seat on the piano bench, stretched his arms and fingers, and then lightly placed his hands above the keys. He drew in a deep breath and let loose !!

You need to get some context about the difficulty and complexity of DJ’s recital. The first piece by Bach has seven movements alone. The Prokofiev piece is radically opposed in style and pace to the Bach suite. Beethoven’s sonata has two masterful sections, and the Schumann piece has eight sections. I followed the sheet music from the Schumann piece which is over 30 pages long. DJ had memorized the entire recital. The ENTIRE thing !! There wasn’t one piece of sheet music used. He played for 45 minutes and it was simply magnificent. When he finished the last piece, tears were streaming down my face.

DJ’s talent was evident. I can’t imagine how much practice occurred to get to the stage we witnessed. It had to be hours upon hours. I was touched about his performance for a few reasons. First and foremost, I was proud of him because I’ve been in his life since his birth. To see him reach this level of accomplishment was personally fulfilling. I was proud of him as were his parents and everyone who had gathered.

Secondly, his performance gave me a picture of looking at talent. You see I play the piano. I took lessons for eight years from Mrs. Lindemann. She was a dear older woman who taught me scales, notes and songs in the hope that I’d learn how to play proficiently. I can still “play” but I never reached the same expertise as DJ. I never had wanted to put in the time and dedication needed. I enjoy playing, but it’s more of a hobby for me.

That is how talent works. Both DJ and I can use that same 88 keys to make music. Where he can play Bach as it was written, I can play some songs from my youth that interested me from Billy Joel and various rock artists. The instrument is a common tool for us to use, but the type and level of our talent is vastly different. Each one of us has the ability to bring music out from pounding the keys to release the hammers upon the piano’s strings.

In organizations, we try to evaluate, measure and judge the talent of people. Instead of releasing their talent, we do our best to confine and restrict it in order to keep some misaligned semblance of order. What if we saw each of our employees as a keyboard just waiting to be played? What would happen if we allowed them to share their talent in the manner they did best? Can you imagine the incredible variety, creativity and ingenuity that could be released?

It’s time we gave our people the tools they need in order for them to share the music locked in each one of them. They all have a recital ready to perform. They know each note and their contributions will range from the majesty of the most complex classical composition to the simplest banging out of Chopsticks. Each song that comes forth is needed in order for the good work of organizations to perform and move forward.

This week pull up a bench in front of the proverbial keyboards in your workplace and encourage everyone to sit down and start playing. Release the talent that is all around you. When you do, you’ll see that you’ve been surrounded by virtuosos this entire time !!

Just to give you a taste of the recital I heard, here’s a video of another pianist playing the Prokofiev sonata DJ shared. Enjoy !!

Recharge Your Battery !!

This past Friday morning I was up early and headed out to my car in the garage. As I turned the key in the ignition, all I heard was a click, click, click. I let out an audible sigh because I knew my battery was dead. This was not how I wanted to start my day !! However, we’re often thrown curves and something unexpected sends us off course from what we had planned to do.

So, I pulled the release lever inside my car to get under the hood. I have changed many batteries over the years. It’s not “fun” and there’s always the possibility that you’ll drop a small piece needed to fasten everything in place deep into the bowels of the engine. When I had the hood propped up, I stood there dumbfounded staring at where I thought the battery would be. Instead, I saw a large silver box with a black plastic cover. On the left side of this contraption there were four bundles of wires attached. I honestly didn’t know what it was.

I got out my owners manual for my 2017 Chevy Equinox thinking I could figure things out. I was wrong. I was even more confused because I couldn’t find the information I needed. The next step was to find a video on You Tube, which all the kids already do, but I’m older and didn’t think of this first. I found an instructional video on how to remove the computer sitting on top of the battery. There were several other steps to remove fasteners, a piece of plastic fascia before you could uncover the battery.

I thought I had everything mastered. I was informed now and knew the steps. I went to my basement to gather the needed tools to extricate the dead battery. I even got a headlamp so I could shed light on my operation. It didn’t work. I couldn’t remove the computer or the cover on it. My frustration took over and I let out more than an audible sigh. Thankfully my wife was still home so we carpooled in her car. I dropped her at her workplace and went to my office using her car. My Equinox was sitting quietly in my garage taunting me and my inability to change a battery.

On Saturday, we put the car in neutral and my wife helped me get the car out onto our driveway which is thankfully flat. I called AAA for roadside assistance (at my house), and waited for help to arrive. A little over an hour later, I got a call on my cell phone to let me know that AAA was “on the scene” and ready to fix my predicament. When I went outside to greet my mechanically adept friend, I was stunned once again.

Out from his tow truck stepped Ed. I knew that from the patch sewn on his uniform shirt. He was an older man who wore a Vietnam Veteran ball cap signifying he served in the military during the Vietnam War. He was so warm and gracious. He laughed when he saw the computer sitting on top of my battery and quipped, “They keep making these things harder and harder don’t they?” I agreed and explained that even though I watched a video, nothing seemed to work. He reassured me that everything would be fine.

The reason I was stunned was that Ed was now in his 70’s and was the same age as my biological dad. My dad passed away in 1968 when I was four years old and he was merely twenty-six. He served four tours in the battlefields of Vietnam. Here I was standing by someone who could have been my dad, and we were doing a dad/son thing by working on my car. I never got to do things like this with my dad, and I struggled not to tear up in front of this stranger.

I stayed out with him and lent a hand where I could. He deftly removed the computer by removing a bolt I didn’t notice (and wasn’t on the video.) Together we removed the dead battery and put a new one in place. While we worked together, I asked him about his time in the army and he shared some great stories. He was still very proud that he had served. After jumping in to the car and making sure it started, I paid him for the battery and his labor, shook his hand and wished him well. It was the best 45 minutes of my day !!

I’m sure Ed had no idea he had recharged my battery as a person. Here I was frustrated with my circumstances not knowing that this lovely older veteran would rekindle fond memories. It reminded me how easy it is to start each day feeling the weight of our situation to the point that we will miss something great right in front of us.

How are YOU doing? Are the realities of life feeling like a burden you can’t shake? Keep in mind that each person you encounter may have those same sinking feelings. The question is -What are you doing to recharge your battery?

We can’t be successful or effective if we are mired in muck. Everyone has challenges. They may be small or massive. It’s hard to say. However, we need to remember we have the chance to be like Ed. By something as simple as showing up, you may make a positive difference in someone’s life.

This week as you head to work I hope you take time to get recharged if you need to. At the same time, I hope you see the opportunities which are sure to come to be the catalyst to recharge someone else. Be encouraged and then be cognizant enough to encourage others. Make a difference and embrace the chance to bring energy and a positive experience to others !!

Runnin’ Down YOUR Dream !!

This Sunday something happened that hasn’t happened for an entire month. The sun came out. Now, I know the sun is always present, but it hasn’t shown itself in Greater Cincinnati during the month of January. Seeing sunlight was a welcome break from the never ending gloom of gray skies. As I was driving to church, I had the Tom Petty radio station blaring on Sirius XM. This is one of may favorites channels which I listen to often.

As I was enjoying the bright blue skies and warm touch of the sunlight, the song “Runnin’ Down a Dream” started playing. It captured the moment perfectly as the first few lyrics started to be sung . . .

“It was a beautiful day, the sun beat down, I had the radio on, I was drivin'”

Listening to this song made my thoughts wander which is a very common occurrence for me. I was taking time to reflect to see if I was someone who ran down my dreams. I think I have. Most everything that has happened throughout my life has led to exciting and adventurous outcomes.

If you don’t know me, I’m a fairly content person. I tend to go with the flow of things. When bumps occur, I ride them out and do my best to remain genuinely positive. This has been my approach to all aspects of my life since I can remember. It’s odd to share this because people don’t think people can be positive and encouraging in this day and age. When I hear those that choose to think differently than I do, I try to get to know them and hear them out. I may not agree with their perspective and outlook, but I’ll do my best to encourage them if they’re open to it.

So, when it comes to dreams, I guess I frame it like this. I like looking forward and pursuing different opportunities knowing that some will work out and others will not. In the past I wanted to become a public speaker, and now I’m fortunate to get to present at events across the globe. I thought it would be great to write a book, and now I’m close to having my second one published. I hoped to have a wife and family, and I’ve now been married over 30 years and I’m getting to see my kids start to figure out life and pursue dreams of their own.

My mind kept wandering and I thought of others who I’m fortunate to have in my life. They are a mix of people who have been successful in a variety of ways along with those who seem to get hung up on obstacle after obstacle. Every person is at a different place on this continuum.

I want to be supportive and encouraging for each of my friends and connections without giving them absolutes. Sure, I have my thoughts and am willing to share advice, but that’s what it is – advice. I’ve never been comfortable giving people a distinct path which much be followed to the letter. Life isn’t like that. It’s full of twists, turns, mountain tops and valleys. Each person’s path is as unique as they are as people.

I think Tom Petty captured my approach in his lyrics in this song. Life is a mystery. We would love for every moment of every day to be concrete and have little variability. But, life won’t conform to set patterns and is constantly unpredictable. Since that’s the reality of each day, the choice we have left is how we will move. We can either move forward, refuse to move, move sideways, or even backwards. There are countless maneuvers we can take.

Take note of the other phrase in Petty’s lyrics. “Going wherever it leads . . . ” Can you do that? Are you willing to step out not knowing what the next step will lead to? You see the mysteries of life are going to continue to present themselves. Having dreams and things to look forward to give us a brighter outlook on the lives we currently lead. Instead of being filled with worry and discontent, try to embrace the chance to go wherever life takes you.

Your career, the choices you make in your family and the people you bring into your life should be those who move you forward. People that embrace your dreams and do what they can to lift you up towards seeing them come true.

If you want to write a book or start a blog, then find those who have done those things and talk with them about what their experience was. If you want to travel to places unknown to you but familiar to others, reach out to them to see those places through their eyes and then take steps to get to them yourself one day. If you want to become a public speaker, an executive or leader in your company, or active in some professional or civic group, seek out others who have paved the way before you.

Remember, you are not doing life alone. You are among those who want to hear your dreams and see them come to fruition. I don’t know what your dream is, but it’s time for you to claim it, pursue it and see where it leads !!