Make the Call !!

A few weeks ago, I received a message on LinkedIn from an HR peer. We had been connected for a few years since she attended the SHRM Annual Conference in Chicago. She was kind enough to attend one of my sessions and introduced herself at a book signing I did.

All of that is wonderful in itself. Her message tugged at my heart because she told me that she and her co-worker were getting burned out. She wondered if I had any ideas that could help her get inspired. She explained that they were just worn out.

Her name is Lauren, and she’s been connected to the HR Net forum since she attended the conference. I think it took courage to reach out to someone you barely knew to ask for help. So, I decided to call her.

I didn’t feel a return message on LinkedIn would do the trick. We set up a time, and I gave her a ring while on my commute home. I have a daily drive of 45 minutes to an hour to get to my office from my house.

When Lauren picked up, we talked as if we had known each other for years. I learned about her family because she was in the process of dropping off her son for soccer practice. I mentioned she didn’t have to chat if she was doing that. She replied that she didn’t want to miss this opportunity. I was humbled and a bit perplexed by that. I felt I was putting her out. He made it to practice easily, and we continued to talk.

We were able to talk the entire commute. I did give her ideas to consider, but mostly I wanted to encourage her. As a fellow HR practitioner, I understand that the work we do can be challenging, overwhelming, and draining. People are a mix of messy and wonderful (just like us). At times, HR can threaten to crush you if you allow the darkness to encompass you. I explained to Lauren that this conversation was the best possible use of my time. It made my day !! I also shared that I’d continue to check in with her to make sure she knew she had someone in her corner.

Too many HR people try to do the good work we do as if they’re on an island. That may be true inside your company, but it isn’t true in general. As humans, we were not designed to be alone. We are meant to be connected and together. I know that Lauren’s story and situation are far too common in our profession. The difference is that she took a chance to reach out.

When I got home, she texted me pictures of her kids, their Halloween costumes, and her wife. I was moved that she took my word on how important it is for us to make human connections with HR peers. Before I wrote this, I checked in to see how she was doing and asked if I could share our conversation. She gave me an update on how some things are getting better while she’s working on other things at the same time. She was geeked that I was going to share this.

This week, reach out. Give someone a call. Make sure you have at least one person in your corner. Trust me. When you do, you’ll see how much it makes your day !!

Peeled Away !!

One of the best aspects of Fall is that the weather breaks. It is cooler each day, and that makes it more inviting to do one of my favorite things – working out in my yard. Seriously. I love getting outside and getting projects done. The sun is no longer beating down on you, and this makes it easier to accomplish things.

This Saturday, after a full breakfast to prep for the flurry of activity, I headed to the hardware store to get some supplies. We have a split rail fence that borders our backyard, and it needed some replacement pieces. I usually have to replace three to four rails a year. I also picked up eight bags of topsoil to use in repositioning and straightening out some landscape border walls.

When I got back home, I grabbed some tools, my Shokz headphones, found a Spotify playlist, and headed out to the yard. After getting the new rails in place and taking the old ones back to my brush pile, I changed course. I needed to get some bulbs in the ground so they’d take root and give us some daffodils in the spring. You always think projects will take mere minutes to complete, but they rarely do. Time seems to expand exponentially, doesn’t it ??

That was okay. I removed some overgrown Russian Sage plants and a conglomeration of gladiolas to make room for the new bulbs. Once all this was done, I hit a wall. You see, in my mind, I’m still this 20-year-old. I’m far from it !! I have the best intentions of working constantly throughout the day, but Father Time is winning. I wasn’t dissuaded. It just meant another course change.

For months, I had noticed our siding on our 2nd floor turn a green hue with moss and mildew. Earlier in the summer, our daughter was visiting for the weekend, and she helped me maneuver our extension ladder so I could use our pressure washer to remove the grime. We were able to address the front of the house, but didn’t have a chance to get to the west side. I decided that removing this green goo was my next project for the day. I asked my wife to come out to spot me, watch the ladder, and move the pressure washer if needed.

I lumbered up the ladder with the washer wand in hand. I took my position with assured footing. Then, I started peeling the green growth off the siding line by line and section by section. It was so pleasing to see the natural color of the siding reappear. As I was up on the roof, I turned around and saw our chimney. You could no longer tell it was constructed of beautiful red brick. The coating that encompassed it was dark green, black, and actual moss was growing, trying to swallow it.

I couldn’t allow the brick to remain covered in slime. I turned the pressure washer around and opened fire. It took several minutes to peel back the layers. It was worth it though !! Years of gunk had given it a completely different appearance. I imagined the brick giving a healthy sigh, knowing it was being restored to its initial state.

The buildup was so great that when it broke off the chimney’s surface, it flew in all directions. Much of it was cast backwards on me. I was covered from head to toe in bits of green and black. I ended up being the filthy one. I didn’t care. Getting the siding and chimney clean gave me pleasure.

This peeling back of layers of all that had grown reminded me of employees. Stick with me here. You see, most people at work take on bits of accumulation based on working in environments that primarily focus on the negative. They can’t shake it off. It just keeps piling on and leads to discoloration. People can still perform, but it’s hard to see the talented person who is still present below the layers and layers of buildup.

What’s even more concerning, we notice something’s not right while the piling on continues. It’s time that HR gets out their pressure washers !! We need to carefully and empathetically peel back the layers of negativity that encompass our people. We also need to set the stage that we’ll no longer foster or tolerate working from the position of “what’s wrong.” Once the surfaces of our people are clean, we need to come at work, problems, and projects from a constructive position. Figure out the opportunities and approaches to move things forward. Assess where things stand, and then unleash the inherent talent of our people.

You’re going to get sprayback when you do this. It will take patience to keep clearing everything away. You may get tired and even want to stop the effort. Press on. Your great people deserve it. Take the time to reveal their talents once again !!

Festival Culture !!

This weekend, Fall finally arrived. It is my favorite season by far !! The leaves change colors, the temperature drops, and you break out your favorite sweatshirt. You spend more time outside even though there’s less daylight. It’s the perfect season in every possible way.

Another aspect of the arrival of Fall is the abundance of festivals. It seems like people can take any singular item and launch a festival. Around here, there are multiple Oktoberfest celebrations, an Apple Festival, a Sauerkraut Festival, the simply named Fall Festivals, and Pumpkin Festivals. My wife told me about one such Pumpkin Festival in the city that adjoins ours. It’s appropriately called Operation Pumpkin, and I wanted to make sure to check it out. She did as well, but she needed to attend a baby shower of one of our cousins. She encouraged me to go anyway. I’m so glad I did !!

Our granddog, Wags, was visiting once again, and he loves to get out and about. He’s very comfortable being social. We made the 15-minute drive over to Hamilton, Ohio, and saw the Festival seemingly pop up out of the ground. We were diverted from the main street running through the city because the festival had taken over. Once we parked, I removed the ever-eager Wags from the backseat of my Equinox and quickly grabbed his leash because he was so excited to join the throng.

There’s no mistaking where the festival started because a display of MASSIVE pumpkins was at the event’s entry point. People were gathered around, all with their phones out, taking pictures. After that eye-catching spectacle, you fell in with the hundreds of people inching their way up and down the street. Booth after booth made up a boundary for everyone on either side. There were crafts, food trucks, beer, tschotskes, a glass blowing exhibit, and countless pumpkins. Artisans were cordoned off in the middle of the street as they did live carving on some of the behemoths.

Wags and I were enthralled with the sights, sounds, smells, and genuine camaraderie of everyone there. People from all walks of life filled every possible space. They ranged from infants to the elderly. You came across people whose arms were so filled with purchases that they could hardly control their finds. Wags was the center of attention, both young and old. I made sure to have him meet some people who were chair-bound, and just wanted to show and receive some affection.

Also, even though Hamilton is a fairly large city, I saw people I knew. That even included one of the teachers from our kids’ daycare who had known them as infants !! She gave me the biggest hug. I couldn’t believe she even recognized me, as the kids hadn’t seen her for 20+ years. It was a wonderful surprise. The others were folks from our church and some HR peers.

As we sat on a wall in front of the County Courthouse to take a break and eat some lunch, I was taken by something unique to festivals. Everyone wanted to be there. Everyone. There was a general sense of joy and engagement. People had a myriad of choices. The variety was available so that you weren’t stuck with just one activity, food choice, or purchase option. If something didn’t pique your interest, you could move to the next booth.

The conversations happening were vibrant, excited, and passionate. You’d hear about people’s experiences and recommendations of what they were seeing. It was as if they didn’t want anyone to miss what they saw. It was encouraging and welcoming. It made me wonder what would happen if our workplaces adopted a festival culture. I’m not suggesting we have booths, food trucks, and carnival rides (although that would be cool). However, if we were intentional about having activities that mattered and interesting conversations, I think we’d see a shift. Festivals are focused on people providing services. Workplaces are focused on work, work, deadlines, stuff, and work. People are an afterthought.

We’re overdue in turning the tide regarding our culture and our approach toward people. When we know we have people who want to be involved, contribute, and add value, why wouldn’t we do everything we could to have an inviting culture ?? People flock to festivals just because they’re happening. I think that is how we should look at having a colorful, energy-filled, and inviting culture in our workplaces.

A Handwritten Note . . .

A few weeks ago, I joined a Zoom call on a Sunday night. Before you jump to conclusions about work/life balance, give me a second to give you some context.

The call was set up to celebrate one of our peers, Mary Williams, who was retiring. It broke into my weekend, but there’s nothing wrong about that interruption at all. I was geeked when I got the invitation to spend some time to thank and encourage Mary for how she’s touched my life and the lives of countless others. Mary is a rare human who takes an immediate interest in YOU the moment you meet her. She’s had a fulfilling and successful career as an HR practitioner ending her time with the appropriate title – Head of People at her company.

Mary and I have been friends for years through volunteer leadership roles, social media connections, and especially as “fierce” rivals as to who was the #1 fan of the exceptional HR Social Hour podcast. (Mary was, and remains, #1 and I’m a reluctant #2 – although I’ll keep pressing.)

One of the many gifts Mary possesses is that her personal touch in the lives of others is expressed in a way that has become a lost art form. She sends you cards. Cards that are handwritten. Cards that bring a smile and also heartfelt tears at the same time. If you get a card from Mary, you can hear her voice as you read the thoughtful note she’s penned inside – just for you. Every person who was able to join the Zoom call shared how Mary’s cards and handwritten notes personally meant the world to them.

The card above is what she sent me, and I’m sure others, who were on the Zoom call that Sunday night. She was thanking me for taking the time to be there for her. She’s incredible and leads me to this thought . . .

Are you giving a personal touch in how you practice HR ?? If not, why not? I know we may have apprehension if we “put ourselves out there,” but I have never found that to be too big of a risk. People want to know they matter and that they’re cared for. It can’t be a thought. It deserves an action.

We have pulled back so far from making our profession human. I think this diminishes our impact and relevance. It honestly doesn’t matter how quickly you can process a spreadsheet or write another policy. That’s going to continue with ease. People are yearning for a personal touch from you. I feel that more and more, our ability to do this naturally will be the key as to whether companies should even have an internal HR function.

I’m not kidding. I feel we’re at a critical crossroads. If we don’t bring the human element to life in our companies on a daily basis, the majority of the rest of our jobs could be outsourced. It’s that essential. Stop being someone who is only technically astute. Give that same attention to being human yourself. Then, take time intentionally to connect with the people around you. Be a people-first HR leader all the time !!

This week – send a card, give someone a handwritten note, make an actual phone call, or take time to visit someone in person. Be the kind of human Mary is and see what a lasting impact you’ll make.

Dignity

This weekend, my wife and I stepped into a world that is far different than our own. Another couple invited us to join them and their adult son to venture to downtown Cincinnati with the Broken Bus Ministry. It was a day I won’t forget.

We started by learning what we were going to do and who we were going to serve. Michelle, the founder of the ministry, gave us a quick orientation to let us know what we would encounter and how to be prepared. The bus is packed from floor to ceiling with a mix of clothing, backpacks, shoes, snacks, supplies, and miscellaneous items that could be used as needed.

The description of the bus being broken is accurate !! It’s over 30 years old, and the engine sputters and coughs as you head down the road. The air conditioning strains to work, and the shocks and suspension are suspect. It’s perfection !! We headed to meet people who are experiencing homelessness. The goal of the day was to check in, provide a meal, put together a sack of snacks and drinks, and assess if the people we met needed other basic life items.

Michelle has been taking volunteers to serve this community every week for the past 14 years !! She is a volunteer as well. Many of the people she serves know her by name and wait eagerly for the bus to arrive. Who we met and what we saw was a simple reminder to be grateful for things we take for granted, such as shelter, food, and safety. After a few stops, we got our bearings and joined in the efforts to serve. My wife manned the biscuits and gravy station, and Trevor, the son of our friends, helped with clothing and snacks. Michelle, Amy and John, and I got out of the bus to talk with the people we saw. We invited them to come get a meal.

It was humbling to see people crawl from their makeshift “homes” to get a container of warm food and other items. The best part of our time serving was the conversations we had. I hadn’t expected this. My friend John noted that when we got back into the bus to move to the next stop, the most obvious and salient thing. “Steve, the number one thing all of these people want is to be treated with dignity.” I felt tears well up in my eyes and agreed.

It’s easy to judge, make statements, and ignore people. It is. The slightest difference causes us to decide the value of the people we encounter. It’s not fair. It’s not necessary. But, it’s 100% human.

During my day downtown, this smacked me firmly between the eyes. I gathered myself, and soon found myself sharing stories, telling jokes, laughing with, and listening to the stories of these folks who were facing insurmountable challenges to make it through the next day. We were in the midst of those who live on the fringe because of choices, life circumstances, drugs, alcohol, and mental illness. In no way did it diminish the fact that they deserved to be treated with grace, care, and respect. It’s not something they regularly receive from the majority of people who move around them.

What would our world look like if we treated each other consistently with dignity? How would workplaces and cultures be shaped if we saw the best in everyone and what they had to offer? How would your day go if you took the time to acknowledge, greet, and encourage others regardless of their circumstances?

I know that my viewpoint was broadened this weekend, and I don’t want to return to a place that ever looks at someone as “less than” me. One of the people we met was so conversational, and he asked if he could share a word with us. We all eagerly said that we’d love to hear what he had to say.

“To quote the great band Cinderella (an epic 80s Heavy Metal Hairband), ‘You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.’ I had everything. A home, a job, loving parents, and more. Never take it for granted. Tell the people in your life you love them. Don’t just show them, tell them. I had those things.”

His wisdom will stay with me for the rest of my life. I won’t look past people again. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity. Everyone. I hope you’ll join me. Together, this simple act could reshape the world.

Step By Step

It’s interesting as you age. Every movement is accompanied by some crack or squeak. There are sporadic shots of pain for no apparent reason. Your brain communicates messages of movement, but your body is hesitant to respond. It takes a concentrated effort to make any advance. This can be disheartening because you’re eager to be as active as you were when you were younger, but time is winning.

I’ve received advice from my primary physician for years to be more active. It is logical and reasonable encouragement. I know that being more active, eating better, and looking out for my overall health makes sense. The pull of inertia, tiredness, and mental exhaustion often causes me to remain motionless even though I know better. You know the saying – “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” That’s where I found myself.

Enter Wags, our grand dog. I’ve written about him often because he’s been such a bright spot in our lives. A few weeks ago, my wife and daughter went on a mother/daughter vacation to Tybee Island and Savannah, Georgia. That meant that Wags and I were brought together. It was magnificent !! You see, Wags is a bundle of frenetic energy while also being an incredibly well-behaved companion. He will patiently wait at the front window, longing for your return. When you hit the door . . . it’s on. He wants to give you ALL of his attention, and he expects ALL of yours !! It’s a fair exchange.

We spent hours playing in our backyard. He would chase an object, bring it back, and then refuse to give it up. Playing keep away was almost as fun as chasing. I think if he could laugh or make a snarky comment about my efforts to retrieve the ball, frisbee, or giant egg, he would. Playing, I soon found out, was just the warm-up lap. He expected me to get out his leash and harness so we could go for an extended walk. Not kidding. If we went a mile, he’d look back as if to say, “Good start. Let’s keep going.”

Each day, we averaged two to three miles per walk. We’d both collapse after getting back, and it felt great !! He never felt the pull of staying put. He needed to move and refused to do it alone. It was exactly the inspiration I required. I looked forward to our daily treks. I had him over the Labor Day holiday weekend, so I chose to drive out to a State Park to up our game. We hiked for miles on trails and through creek beds. I noticed that each day we were active, I felt better. Yes, my creaks and cracks were still present, but I didn’t become discouraged. The soreness meant I was using muscles that were designed to move and not be dormant.

After Wags returned home with Melanie, I had a choice. I could easily return to the world of being sedentary, or I could keep moving one step at a time. I began a nightly routine after work of walking. I didn’t let the excuse of the weather or the reality of a challenging day stop me. I decided to walk anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour through my neighborhood. It’s been just what I needed. I was finally following my doctor’s instructions. Finally.

Where are you stuck? What is keeping you in place, unable to move? We all have areas like this. All of us. Here’s what I know. If we aren’t healthy ourselves, we can’t help others be healthy. It’s contradictory. Let me encourage you not to fall into the trap of thinking about giant shifts and impossible leaps. Take one step. Just one. Then the next one. See where you find yourself going !!

You’re On the Team !!

My life is surreal. Seriously.

For the past several years, I’ve been fortunate to give presentations around the country. I get to live out a dream I’ve had to be a public speaker. Each time I am asked to speak, I’m both geeked and humbled. Humbled because I never want to take any opportunity for granted. Geeked because I get amped up any time I get to meet my HR peers.

This week, I was invited to speak at the HR Conference for Major League Soccer (MLS) !! Our local team, FC Cincinnati, was the host location. It was so cool to have the soccer stadium as the environment where I gave my presentation. The room was filled with HR practitioners from each of the 30 MLS teams as well as folks from their corporate office. I was given 90 minutes to fill to kick off their event.

We had a great time laughing, sharing stories, and bonding as HR peers. I gathered all of my office toys, talked with a few of the attendees, and headed back to my office. After the experience, I opened a small, branded FCC bag to look at what was inside. I was giddy because I knew in advance what was there.

When the HR team asked if I’d consider being a speaker, they asked if there was anything I’d like. I took a chance and made the ask. I wondered if I could get a personalized FCC jersey. I was stunned when they asked what size, what color, and what number I’d like !! I quickly stated I’d love a blue jersey with my fave number 31. It was the number I wore all the years I played basketball 40+ years ago.

When I pulled the jersey from the bag, I was overjoyed !! It was an example of “being” on the team. It also made me contemplate what it means to be on a team of human resources professionals.

When I began my career, I was an HR department of one for my first several years in the field. I never understood or knew that there were other HR pros anywhere close to where I worked. I made a conscious choice to step out and explore the possibility that others did what I did. It was the best personal and professional choice I made. I soon found out that there were countless others practicing HR across the globe.

This reality excited me, and I assumed it would excite others just as much. I was mistaken. You see, I feel that the HR profession is still far too isolated and fragmented when it doesn’t have to be. I think this is because so many of my peers continue to keep their heads down, buried in the work for which they’re responsible. I appreciate people being diligent. You should be. However, there’s no reason to be disconnected from others who also practice HR.

We’re all on the team !!

Jeff Berding, the co-CEO of FC Cincinnati, stated something that rang true with me and those in the room. He stated that there is no better time for HR to lead and thrive because we’re the profession that cares for people. He’s right. It’s always been the case. It’s just a matter of whether we see ourselves in this same light.

You aren’t alone. I feel tied and connected to the 50+ people I met on Friday. I extended an invitation for them to connect with me on purpose. I ended my presentation with this encouragement.

“Don’t leave this conference only having talked with the people you already know and work with. Reach out to the others here. Get to know them. You’re all on the same team. The team of HR !!”

This week, make sure to know I consider you on my team if you are an HR peer, regardless of where you work, where you live, or what industry you support. Teams pull together. Teams lift each other up, and most importantly, teams thrive !! Get your jersey. Put it on. Take the field. People are waiting for us !!

Borders

This past weekend brought a welcome break in our weather. The summer was sweltering, which made it challenging to do much work outside. Since we had some fall-like weather, I decided to get out in the yard and finish a project that I had started over a year earlier.

Our daughter had something unique piled up in her garage. The back left corner of it was filled with landscape pavers. The stack was giant not only because they were a foot wide each, they also rose four feet above the floor. She was barely able to get her car in the garage without getting too close to the sprawling mass. The person who had owned the house two owners before her had used them all over the yard. Now they were just sitting there gathering spiderwebs and grime.

I asked her if I could take them to our house and use them to edge our beds. She thought that would be a great use of them, and told me she’d bring a load back home the next time she visited. When she came a few weeks later, I was concerned because the weight of the pavers really showed in the back of her SUV. Her wheels were struggling because she tried to bring so many. The repurposing of the pavers was wonderful. We had wanted to give the beds in the back and right side of our house more definition.

We used all of the pavers she brought in the first trip quickly. We only had enough to do the bed in the backyard that bordered our back patio. We thought we would have had more than enough to finish everything. I suggested we measure the next bed, and told her that I’d drive up to get the next load because my car was older. With everyone’s schedule in our two families, more time passed before I could get more pavers. I stacked them on my front patio to be used for the side yard.

The seasons changed, and I couldn’t get out to create the border I had wanted to finish quickly. That brings us back to this weekend. With a gap in time and nothing on my schedule, it was overdue to finish the landscape border. It took all afternoon, but it was worth it !! I had to work the edge to make sure the grass was back far enough to set the pavers in place. I added topsoil under each paver to make sure they would be level as I laid them end to end. Having a dedicated space for our flowers and shrubs to thrive was just what I was hoping for.

Borders remind me of how we should look at the roles and responsibilities we have for employees within our companies. I believe in this approach versus the traditional job descriptions we’ve used for decades. Most job descriptions are nothing more than a list of tasks we develop to justify the jobs people fill. They rarely describe what and how people truly do their daily work.

Writing something that provides people with parameters for them to work is essential. If people have enough room to grow, develop, and perform, then they’ll be able to thrive, just like our plants. Isn’t that better? If people had the latitude to stretch, use their strengths, and be creative in a broader system and environment, think how much better our companies would be.

This week, take a lesson from my landscaping adventure. Get rid of the roots and uneven ground your people have been given with lists of tasks only meant to confine. Instead, level things out and give them a border that allows them to be the talented people they’ve always been !!

Onward

A week ago, I was able to experience something I’ve been wanting to do for quite some time !! My daughter, Melanie, and I went to a WNBA game. She lives in Indianapolis, so of course, we had to become Indiana Fever fans. We were following the team before they were transformed with the addition of Caitlin Clark.

Basketball is something that has been a shared passion for my daughter and me. I played all through high school, and even considered playing at the collegiate level. I was geeked when my daughter caught the basketball bug at an early age herself. She also played through high school, and I was fortunate to get to coach her for a few years when she was just learning the game. On top of all of this, we became fierce Xavier University basketball fans because we live in greater Cincinnati. We attended several games over the years, and they are some of my favorite memories of doing things together.

The Fever game was a special surprise as a birthday gift from Melanie. We had to wait eight months for the game to happen. During that time, Clark became injured. She has helped transform the WNBA along with other new talents. It’s exciting for people to finally get on board to support and see these amazing women perform. They play a pure form of basketball that is a joy to watch.

Melanie was bummed that Caitlin Clark wouldn’t be playing when we went. Unfortunately, the Fever had lost two other key players to injury. They’ve had to add some new players on short-term contracts to do their best to weather this string of injuries. I told her that I was bummed as well, but the key to me was spending time with her watching another game in person.

The environment, arena, and crowd were electric. There was a buzz the moment we parked the car in the attached parking garage. Every single person had Fever branded gear on. Every. One. I had never seen anything so compelling. You didn’t know the extent of how much people knew the game, the players, or how deeply they were fans. However, they seemed to be fully in by their excitement.

We visited the team store and bought some gear of our own. We were as caught up in the fervor as everyone else. As we made it to our seats, we were set with snacks and an incredible view. We took in every moment and cheered the Fever on through the ups and downs of the action. In the end, the team lost. We were hoping for a better outcome, but we were far from disappointed. The outcome never mattered. The time with Melanie did.

The entire time we spent together, I was reminded that we were surrounded by people moving . . . onward. The Fever had lost several of their players, but they still played with the intent of winning. They could have let their circumstances stop them. They could also have just put in little effort to compete. The fans could have chosen not to attend because the players they expected to see weren’t going to take the court. After the loss, the fans could also have sworn to never support the team again. I’m fairly sure that won’t happen.

How is it for you and others at work? How much of your day is spent stuck in the various circumstances you’re facing? When have you found yourself stagnant and unable to move because of all that life is handing you?

We need to move onward. We need to surround ourselves with others who will support and encourage us. The circumstances of life are always going to be unpredictable and unforeseen. There’s no escaping it. Moving forward through whatever comes our way is sure to be challenging. It may take time and concerted effort, but you can do it. You can.

Onward.

Wandering . . .

Have you ever hit a dry patch at work? In life?

It just seems that no matter what you do, you keep wandering with little hope of an end in sight. As you feel this happening, you buckle down and work even harder, convincing yourself you can muster the fortitude to push through. What you encounter is more sand, endless dunes on the horizon, and the sweltering sun pounding down on you.

I’ve hit one of those patches. It’s not because I don’t have an overflowing plate of work in front of me. I’m also not alone. I’m fortunate to work with an incredible team both in HR and in all the areas of work throughout the company. I have books, blogs, endless resources, and now I can ask ChatGPT anything in the world. It hasn’t broken through.

People give sage advice about self-care, taking time off, surrounding myself with music, etc. There are countless ideas people are willing to share. They know the arid feeling, and there are many approaches that have worked . . . for them.

Please understand that I’m not sharing this for sympathy. It’s intended to help us all be aware that people can be wandering through their own deserts while working in the same general space as you are. They may not express it because they’re not sure that it’s safe to share, or they may fear how they’ll be viewed if they choose to be vulnerable. I see desert wandering happening all around me on a daily basis. There is no one reason or cause for people to find themselves in these dry patches. But they are very real.

The key is to be observant. Watch for signs of people feigning interest in others at work. See if someone who is normally engaged starts to pull away and spend more time on their own – more than they had in the past. See if conversations are short, curt, and elusive. It’s as if they’re getting through their day with the smallest interactions possible.

Don’t assume the worst, though. It’s far too easy for us to see some of these things going on with others and jump to conclusions about mental health, counseling, etc. Each of these should be on our radar. We need to check in on our people and get a take on how they’re doing. We have to get out of the pattern of only interacting when there is a task at hand or a behavior to address. We would be far more successful in being human ourselves by checking in on others just because. No agenda. No deadline to address. No “reason.” The reason is simple enough. They’re our people. That gives you all the latitude you need to connect.

Let me share what has worked for me . . .

I reach out to friends who are in HR who are outside my company. It’s rare that HR pros can have someone to turn to inside their company because part of the nature of their role is to be the person who steps alongside others. Others don’t pair up alongside HR.

I had two friends out of the blue reach out this week. One said, “You were on my heart today and I just wanted to check in on you.” Priceless. The other person reached out and shared a story of how something I had shared encouraged her. She just wanted me to know. Also priceless.

After I started to capture my thoughts for this post, I had a handful of other HR pros who reached out to just check in. I’m grateful that there are people who want to make themselves available to listen. It’s needed for everyone.

Deserts are going to come. You can’t avoid them. I want to encourage you to always have a circle of dear friends you can reach out to, so you can get through them. Also, be a person who’s willing to reach out and check in on others. A simple note or phone call may be just the thing they need to navigate through the sand to greener landscapes !!