Category: Leadership

Life At 3 MPH

Are you someone who always seems to be in a hurry ?? Whether it’s work, home life, community activities, or just the myriad of thoughts that never seem to slow down in our minds. If we were honest, I think most of us are hurried. We don’t know anything different. In fact, I think it’s become so much the norm that we can’t think of going through a day without being rushed.

Now, it’s ironic that even though we’re in this constant state of hurriedness, we don’t like it. It’s exhausting. We look for ways to somehow slow the pace of life. We don’t succeed very often because if we try to slow down, the others around us don’t. Then we become anxious because we feel we’re behind. It’s an awful spiral to find yourself in !!

Being hurried is a choice. We may not think it is, but it is. The idea of living life at a constant blistering pace isn’t healthy. And, if you think that remaining constantly on the go makes you vastly more successful than others, you’re mistaken. We mistake activity for production. It’s just an activity. I’ve been thinking about this lately, because the pace of life seems to be far more out of control. Not only for me personally, but also for the people around me. People I work with and care for.

What I’ve found is that a hurried pace of life may get me somewhere quicker, but at what cost? I can’t tell you how many heavy sighs I exhale every day just to make sure I’m staying up with all that’s in front of me. Some of those sighs are to catch my breath. Others are signals of exhaustion and exasperation. Like most people I know, I’m a high-capacity person. I feel more complete when my life and days are full. Staying full is important. The challenge isn’t capacity. It’s maintaining a breakneck pace day in and day out.

I’ve decided that this has to change. I’m adopting the 3 MPH approach to life.

Did you know the average human walks at a pace of three miles per hour ?? How cool is that? When you approach your day, stay at the average pace of walking. When you do, you’ll naturally slow down. You can’t help yourself. When you start incorporating this intentionally slower lifestyle, you see the things around you that you used to rush by without noticing them at all. You’ll see people whom you could meet. There are scenes of nature that will all of a sudden come to life. It’s amazing !!

These things have most likely been present all the time; you just didn’t see them. Instead of holding onto a sinking feeling that you’re missing out on things unless you run at life with abandon, understand you’re actually missing more. Being still takes discipline. Slowing down will initially feel unnerving, but stay strong and stick with it. This week, slow down. Don’t keep seeking the pace you can’t keep. Try to live life at 3 MPH and see what happens !!

Calm in Chaos

When I was younger, I loved playing softball. I started when I was in college, playing on co-ed teams. Post graduation, I joined my cousin’s team for his law firm, a co-ed team we had with Young Friends of the Zoo (a volunteer group), and a men’s team through my church. I loved the pace, the camaraderie, and the chance to be a little “athletic.” Please note that I was never the best person on the team. Far from it. I could hold my own in the field and was a bit of a secret because I was one of the few left-handed players in each league.

I loved being on teams and competing. In some teams I was on, the focus was far more social than trying to take the league title. It was a nice balance to the men’s teams I was on that tended to be far more competitive. Quick reminder – these were softball teams. That didn’t seem to matter to some because their competitive juices would jump to the surface the moment the lineups were set. I enjoy winning. I don’t know who doesn’t. However, to win at all costs and with any level of behavior, not so much.

One other odd facet of playing on all of these various teams was that I usually became the team coach or manager. I was never the person who started the teams, but sometime during our season, I landed in the coaching chair. I loved it. This gave me more excitement than playing the games because I had the opportunity to check in on each member of our team to see how they were doing as humans. I’d go out of my way to ask about them, their families, their jobs, and keep track of how things were going. Making sure we were a unit was far more important to me than focusing on the few superstars we had on our roster.

One of the teams I was fortunate to lead for 20 years was always at the top of the standings. We were usually playing for the championship every year. We weren’t the most talented team ever. We were consistent and played together. I made sure we took time to encourage each other, whether we were batting or out in the field. I made sure we emphasized sportsmanship regardless of how the games progressed or the final outcome.

In most leagues, you find that you’re going to have one or two rivals. It just happens. Ironically, in our church league, we had such a rival. Our ragtag group of guys would take the field with the other team, who evidently had more financial backing than we did. Crisp uniforms, great equipment, etc. They were uber-competitive !! Trash talking, coarse language, and making fun of when our players performed at a standard less than they thought should be as elite softball players.

One time, as we were playing each other for the league championship, the tension was building each inning. My players were getting very frustrated with the tone and approach of our rivals. You could feel it was about to boil over and explode when I called a time-out. Instead of pulling our team together to rally them to stay calm and continue playing, I walked out to the center of the field. This was not how these were supposed to go.

I stood there and addressed our rivals and our team. I explained that there was no reason for this level of anger, frustration, and poor behavior. We were playing for our churches. It didn’t reflect who we should be, and I stated that if it continued, I was going to have us forfeit. We weren’t going to be a part of this. By the way, we were winning at this point.

A silence came over the entire field. The umpire came out to me and said, “I got this.” He called the captains of both teams together, and we had a reset. The game continued and was far more enjoyable. In the end . . . we lost. However, we kept calm in the midst of a very tense situation. As we shook hands after the game, the guys from the other team apologized, and we made peace.

Now, I understand that tensions rising during a church softball game isn’t “chaos.” Most people who consider things chaotic aren’t truly, but they are for them. We all encounter times in our lives where chaos erupts. The question is, who will lead people through what they are facing? There are far too many people who look to the loudest, most charismatic voice in the room. They may be loud, but that doesn’t automatically translate into leadership.

There’s also a difference in asking people to just calm down. That’s not helping either. We need to be leaders who remain calm ourselves. Take time to listen, assess, and then step in. By being the one who keeps calm during times of chaos, you’ll find people identify you as a leader. One that they can follow confidently.

Today, chaos seems to be happening everywhere. It gets more attention than those who choose to be calm. Stay strong. Be calm. Step in. Lead.

A Snow Day Reminder

My wife and I were hunkered down this weekend, anticipating the predicted winter storm. We were told that we’d get over a foot of snow. Now, living in Greater Cincinnati for the majority of my life, I have become skeptical of weather reports like this. In fact, several of the meteorologists slyly joked that we’d all be in our homes, wondering if the massive amount of snow would truly arrive.

Well, it did !! It started very slowly and then built up overnight while we were asleep. Sunday morning revealed a deep blanket of snow everywhere. That wasn’t even the end of the weather adventure. It continues to snow and accumulate as we saw more and more objects disappear under the encompassing white covering. Thankfully, we were safe, warm, and kept our power throughout the storm.

This weather was the talk of everyone around here on social media. Church services were canceled, stores and restaurants closed early, and we were sure all of the surrounding schools would be closed on Monday. This story isn’t unique. This particular storm reached across the majority of the U.S. with frigid temperatures, ice in many forms, and challenging circumstances.

The snowstorm forced me to slow down and reflect. Something I don’t do nearly enough. I was struck by the fact that while I was stuck in my house for a period of time, there were many who continued to work. People who, a mere six years ago, were considered “essential.” The road crews, public workers, hotel staff, hospital employees, and police and fire crews. That doesn’t even cover all of the folks who remain the backbone and foundation of the work being done all the time.

Once the pandemic receded into some form of normality, we quickly slipped back into a mindset of a work environment that is predominantly focused on professional-level office jobs. This is backwards and upside down. With 80% of the workforce occupying non-office roles, the focus is misplaced.

Honestly, wouldn’t it be better if every role, job, industry, and occupation were always considered essential ?? Why do we continue to only value people in certain roles when an emergency occurs? We’ve become so narrowly focused as a society. The only things that get our focus are those that affect us personally. We don’t take the time to raise our heads from the daily grind we find ourselves in to acknowledge or recognize the contributions of the many people around us. We still have the expectation of “getting things done” far more than valuing the talent and effort everyone brings daily in their given occupation.

No more. I want to be a person who happens to work in HR who is grateful and benefits from the work of those who don’t hold office positions. We all should have this mindset !! Let’s do what we can to turn the tide so we don’t have to have the next catastrophe hit in order to see the people who make up our foundation. Value everyone. Make sure they are all essential !!

Looking Ahead !!

This weekend, my wife and I did one of our favorite activities by going to see a movie in a theater. We’re both big fans of movies, and there still isn’t an experience as grand as seeing a movie on the big screen. There just isn’t.

I had to do a bit of convincing to get her to see the feature I wanted to see, but she agreed to give it a go. We chose to see Song Sung Blue starring Hugh Jackman and Kate Hudson. I was fully engrossed the moment Jackman started the film. The script was wonderful, and every member of the cast was perfect. There were several actors who had been very popular in the past who came back to the screen and crushed it. On top of the story, you laid in the incredible musical catalog of the legendary Neil Diamond.

For me, the movie was very emotional. I think I cried 6 or 7 times throughout the film. The story has giant highs and extreme lows. It’s very human and based on a couple who were featured in an award-winning documentary. They saw themselves as entertainers who wanted to help people forget their troubles for the few moments they saw their shows. Jackman played Mike Sardina, who fancied himself a Neil Diamond interpreter nicknamed Lightning, and Hudson played his talented wife, nicknamed Thunder.

To say this couple experienced “life” would be an understatement !! Much of their lives was fraught with tough choices, poverty, and a lack of what many would consider success. It didn’t squelch their passion or desire to constantly move forward. Their dream to perform never dimmed. Never. They didn’t know what lay ahead for them or their family members, but they kept looking ahead.

It was a magnificent movie, which I highly recommend not only because you’ll enjoy it, but also because it conveys a great message for where we are today as a society. We all wish we had a crystal ball that clearly revealed what would come next for us in our daily lives. We don’t, and it’s a good thing. Life is unpredictable and always will be.

The question is, “How will you react when the unexpected comes?”

We’re on the edge of beginning a New Year. Most of what you read, see, and hear is dripping with disdain, negativity, and divisiveness. “What’s wrong” is the lens that leads most people’s days, regardless of what they’re facing. That is discouraging and could lead to you getting mired down to the point of not moving at all. Even if you choose to be immobile, life continues to move around you.

I think we’d be better off as individuals and as a society if we learned from Lightning and Thunder by pushing forward by first coming together. They realized how much better they were as a duo to tackle what was in front of them than trying to gut things out on their own.

I’m excited about 2026, and I have no idea what will happen. I refuse to succumb to the antagonism and darkness that try to claw for my attention and emotions. I will do all I can to see the best in others, even if they fail me (because I’m sure to fail others myself). I will encourage others to thrive and be there to listen to how life is treating them. I will pursue my passions and make sure to reach out to connect with others any time I can. When something unexpected comes, I’ll pause, assess, and then move forward. That’s how I choose to look ahead !!

To give you just a tiny flavor of the film, here’s a deep cut Neil Diamond hit they played. Just phenomenal !!

Be Pliable !!

If you haven’t already figured this out, I’m a big kid in an older adult’s body. By the way, I’m very cool with that. I know I have peers who are far more concerned with their title and level in their company than I am. It’s never been a focus for me. And, may I add, I feel that a person’s actions and behavior are far more indicative of who a person is than any title resting on a business card.

I love to have fun every day. It doesn’t really matter if I’m at work, out in the community, at an HR conference/event, or at home. There’s always time to see the possibilities of what will bring people a smile or make them giggle.

I recently added a favorite toy to my menagerie at work – Play-Doh. I mean, how can you really overlook this wonderful substance? I remember playing with Play-Doh for hours upon hours when I was younger. My brother and I would make all types of abstract shapes and “sculptures” while mixing as many colors together as we could. It seemed like you could never come up with every possibility of creation with Play-Doh. It has a true infinite quality.

The reason for having a container of this magnificent matter on my desk is so that I have a reminder about the positive aspects of being pliable and moldable. I find that many people are very rigid. They live in an “either/or” world. There’s no gray seen or considered. There is one side or another. Period.

That’s a miss in my opinion. People are like Play-Doh. They can bend, squish, stretch, expand, or contract. They’re unpredictable, colorful, and not limited to a tight set of do’s and don’ts. No matter how much HR or organizations try to keep people fenced in, they will move in, around, above, or below the barriers we arbitrarily construct.

I think we should take a different approach. We should acknowledge that there’s more potential in being pliable and moldable as individuals and as a work culture. People need the ability to move and become new creations on a regular basis. It’s in our nature as humans. Always move. Always grow. Always take on new shapes.

Wouldn’t it be better to have leadership, culture, and a workplace that chose to be moldable instead of concrete? When you adopt this, you will rarely hear that tired old phrase, “Because we’ve always done it this way.” A pliable environment allows for far more solutions, perspectives, and opportunities than the traditional atmosphere people want to cling to. With all of the potential changes on the horizon for how work will be done, you can’t afford to be sedentary.

This week, buy a jar of Play-Doh. Put it on your desk. It will be a constant reminder for you to remain flexible personally, and it will reframe the possibilities of how you can bring out the best in others !!

Fun note . . .

I had shared this article originally in the weekly email newsletter I send out as part of my HR Net forum. At the end of this week, a friend dropped off an unexpected gift that he felt would accompany my new toy. Check this out !! A Play-Doh Pizza Kitchen (since I work for an amazing pizza company) So, freaking cool !!

One Scoop At A Time

This weekend, we had our second significant snowfall. I’m personally very geeked about this because I grew up where snow was a regular occurrence. People in Cincinnati state they love getting snow . . . until it happens. When it hits, you see chaos ensue. People are unsure how to drive, and everything grinds to a screeching halt. The TV meteorologists are in storm mode. They fill the airwaves with doom and gloom. You’re told you’re about to face the apocalypse, when it’s just a few inches of snow.

Growing up, my dad taught me the art of shoveling a driveway. He was meticulous. He had the expectation that when you were done, the entire surface would be as clean as possible. No straggling trails of snow remnants were allowed. My brother and I would often have to go back out to get those tiny trails of snow that come off the edges of your shovel because we weren’t really “done.” This left a giant imprint on us. There was merit to this, which was laced with a layer of undue pressure.

So, when the garage door creaked open this morning, I saw a blanket of white facing me. I turned on my Spotify playlist (Brit Pop Indie 90s in case you wanted to check it out), started my workout app on my watch, took a deep breath, laid down the blade of my snow shovel, and made my first scoop. We received five inches of snow, which is fairly significant for us. On top of the volume of snow spread out across our driveway, the final two feet was dense and massive because the township snowplow had deposited all of the snow from the road firmly at the apron of every house on the cul-de-sac.

I set out to tackle the task before me, feeling the frigid temperatures with every breath I took. Oh, did I mention that it was zero degrees when I started with a wind chill that made it even colder ?? Not complaining. Just setting the stage. Steadily and slowly, I made my way across and down the driveway. I broke it down by sections, making sure that each one was cleared completely (could hear my dad’s voice in my head). I was making great headway until I hit the gunk deposited across the apron.

My activity had gone from eagerly pushing the snow across the width of the surface to barely moving at all. The rest of the snow gave very little resistance to being moved. This mix was significantly different. The weight was tripled at least !! Therefore, you had to move it one scoop at a time. You couldn’t even toss it across to an edge. It had to be walked over and deposited.

There were a few moments of labored breathing, and I felt like walking away. I could drive over it. Why overexert myself? I knew this wasn’t a realistic option. I needed to make sure the driveway was cleared. So, I kept at it methodically. Bit by bit, the apron started to appear. In the end, it took me an hour to finish shoveling. I was ready to be done. Frozen fingers and face were getting the best of me. However, it was done.

As I dropped into a chair in my family room to recover, I thought about how my shoveling was a lot like a healthy approach to work. We see the expanse of a problem sprawling out before us, just like a snow-covered driveway. We have an urge to make large efforts to clear out the problem as quickly as we can. Expediency is the drive. It’s not feasible, but we convince ourselves that if we work hard enough, we can knock it out.

The reality is that the problem needs to be addressed in a measured way. Even though this takes more time, the result is better. As you start moving the light objects in your way, you make progress easily. When things get a bit more difficult, you pause, evaluate what’s needed, then make the next scoop. You may get a bit anxious and frustrated because the end of the project is in sight. Continuing to stay disciplined and measured is needed all the way until the end.

When you adopt this approach, you’ll see that the project has been cleared with no straggling trails. This week, step back and see how you’re approaching work. Be more measured. Make sure to take one scoop at a time.

Deflated

With Thanksgiving completed, it was time once again to decorate our house for Christmas and the holidays. I don’t know about you, but when Thanksgiving is the last Thursday of the last week of November, it feels like December is seven days long instead of being a full month. There seems to be undue pressure to get everything done all of a sudden.

On top of the perceived time crunch, winter has fully landed in Greater Cincinnati !! It is frigid. So, when I went to put up my outside inflatables community (Yes, I have several), along with a lighted tree that needed to be assembled, wrapping our porch poles in lights, and covering bushes in our front bed, I was shivering the entire time. I’m not complaining. I pushed through as best as I could, but I had to stop short. I didn’t get everything done that I wanted to accomplish because I couldn’t feel my hands. Eek !!!

I love putting up the community of inflatables. They’re all connected via an intricate system of intertwined extension cords and anchoring wires so they don’t float away. Once the timers hit the “Dusk” setting, they slowly inflate and cover the majority of our front flower bed. It brings me joy to see them spring to life. Each morning, as the timer moves to the “Dawn” setting, you see them fall slowly to the ground as they deflate. They no longer have the energy to be full, shining, and present.

Sound like our employees ??

Too many folks these days are deflated at work. Sure, they may be visible in the workplace or on some overly monitored screen, but that doesn’t mean they’re full of life, far from it. The question is – Do we even notice ?? Unfortunately, I don’t think we normally do unless a person’s behavior becomes so detached that you see it whenever you interact with them.

I’m continually astonished by how we spend so much time discussing work regarding deadlines, revenue pressures, and how we all have too many meetings. However, we don’t talk often enough about our employees unless we’re complaining about the few that seem to always be a challenge to work with. The majority of employees come to work daily and are treated like placeholders. This should not continue.

December, year-end, and the holidays can be a trying time for people for a variety of reasons. It’s easy to become deflated. We need to notice. To do that, our desk and our screens can’t be more important to us than the people we work (and live) with. We need to be the ones who are the energy source that brings them back to life. Once we do that, you’ll see that people will fulfill their calling and purpose.

We always take time to seek out all of the Christmas decorations and displays in our neighborhoods. In fact, we’re eager to see them !! Let’s do the same with our people because they are with us all the time, and not just seasonally.

Because I Knew You

Do you have anyone you can think of who has left an imprint on you ?? More than one ??

It’s a question that has been on my mind lately because we live in a world and at a time where people seem to focus primarily on themselves. The sentiment that you must look out for yourself first is prominent both personally and professionally. There are countless books who encourage and emphasize a self-focused approach to every aspect of life. It’s daunting to dare to think or act differently.

However, I strongly feel that we need to become less self-focused in order to truly affect change and foster sustainable leadership and relationships. It is important to be self-aware and self-assured. I find that if you are, then you’ll see that you’re “good” most of the time, and can focus on others more naturally and easily.

This weekend, after a great time with my extended family for the Thanksgiving holiday, my wife and I took my mom out to eat at a Mexican restaurant. We had been driving for over five hours and didn’t feel like cooking a meal. The restaurant is less than a mile from our house, and it’s a fave landing place for us. When our server approached the table, I could tell she had a spark in her eye. When she asked if we had made our choices, I attempted to order in Spanish. Mind you, I don’t speak Spanish.

She giggled and responded to me in Spanish. I pulled out my phone and looked up Google Translate because I planned to converse with her in Spanish for the rest of the night. I asked for a refill of my Diet Pepsi, and she quipped, “Mas bebida.” I typed “Mas vevida?” and she grabbed my phone to correct me. “More drink. Mas bebida.” We both laughed, and I saw her go speak to her co-workers while pointing back at our table.

There were more interactions we had, and when it was time to leave, I said, “¿Me puede dar la cuenta por favor?” She replied, “Si.” I laughed and told her that was too easy. We talked at our table for another ten minutes, and then left to pay. As we hit the door, our server waved and exclaimed, “Adiós, amigos !!” She had made our night out spectacular.

Earlier in the week, our family took time to go see Wicked for Good in the theater. It was an incredible sequel. The final song includes the compelling lyric, “Because I knew you, I have been changed for good.” As I was crying (because that’s what I do), the lyric touched me. I was sitting in the aisle with my mother, wife, brother, sister-in-law, nephew, and his wife. Each one of them has changed my life for good in one way or another.

The more I think about it, I can think of how many, many people have changed my life for the better. In fact, most of them have. I feel that if you view each encounter with others as having value, you’ll become more and more others-focused. Then, you’ll have a memorable encounter with a server at a restaurant.

This week, let’s all agree to be more cognizant that we are people who are known by others, and that can lead to change that is good.

It Is Better to Give . . .

. . . to bless those who receive.

I know that’s not the exact quote, but I’d like you to hang with me for a few minutes to explain.

Next year, I will be starting my 40th year as an HR practitioner !! It is so hard to grasp this reality. My career started off with a flair, followed by a failure. I was so fortunate to begin my HR journey at a Fortune 100 company. They’ve been successful for almost 190 years. The challenge of my first role didn’t involve what I did; it was in regards to the culture. Now, you have to remember that when I started in HR, no one talked about company culture. No one. You were expected to go to work and accept things as they were. You would have never thought of questioning any aspect of a company’s culture. It was unheard of.

I learned the hard way that since I didn’t do well with conformity, I wasn’t long for this role. After 18 months, when I was presented with an opportunity to leave Cincinnati and move to a rural place and work in a manufacturing company, I chose to leave instead. Did I mention that I was young, arrogant, and narrow-minded at this time in my career ?? Did I also note that I didn’t have another job when I left my first HR job ??

I was sure that people would want to hire me right away because of my education and the experience I had just earned. I mean, it was an entire 18 months !! I was clueless . . . and unemployed. I jumped into the job search process right away. These were the days before the internet existed. I was unsuccessful. I had no nibbles or interviews. The time of my transition only expanded. It started to get pretty stark. I asked my parents for a loan so I could maintain my apartment and pay my bills. I took a part-time job with friends doing landscaping at minimum wage. And, my girlfriend at the time (who has now been my wife for 36 years), stood by my side and bought me groceries. I couldn’t afford even the basics.

To say this experience was humbling doesn’t adequately describe what I was going through. I never thought that I’d be in a place where I would lose everything and not be able to get out of it. I was so grateful for those who gave to help me. I’ve never taken it for granted since.

I was able to find another HR job after 13 months. 13 months. My view on life and work had forever been altered . . . for the better. I now appreciated that I had the ability to work. I was more mindful and thankful for those I worked with. I understood that life could change in a moment, regardless of who you were or what job you held.

Back to today . . .

People are feeling the need to be givers at this time. The challenges in the economy and the recent government shutdown have touched people’s hearts. Giving has grown dramatically. People are willing to give what they can to help others in need. It’s just like when I was in need myself.

Yesterday, I was participating at a Food Drive for a local mission. I’m involved with them as a Board Member, and my wife volunteers there. I only mention this because of an encounter I had at the event. I saw a familiar face as we were talking to people coming to Kroger. He said, “Hey, I see you at the door greeting me and my wife at church !!” I said, “I’m Steve, and you are?” He replied, “I’m Doug. My wife Joyce and I have been coming for a few months. I’d like to do something a little more than this, but I won’t have everything purchased by the time you wrap up here today.”

“No problem,” I stated. “Just bring whatever you’d like to church tomorrow, and I’ll take it from there. I’ll be going to the Mission on Monday afternoon for a meeting, and I’d be glad to take your donation there.” Sunday came, and Doug met me at the door. “Can I put what we got in your car?” he asked.

“Absolutely, I’ll meet you in the back parking lot.” He pulled around, and my jaw hit the ground when I saw what he wanted to give me. The amount of food he and his wife had purchased filled the back of my car !! I thanked Doug profusely and mentioned that what they gave would bless those who would receive it.

This isn’t about how much you do or don’t give. I want to encourage you, though, to be someone who gives regularly. You pick where you want your giving to go. This isn’t only about material items either. We all can give our time as volunteers, people who can serve on boards, or people who can lend a hand to someone in need. I learned first hand about how other’s willingness to give helped me at the time I most needed it.

Your giving will do the same. Take a moment and see what you can do. Choose to move forward and not be idle. Whatever you can do will matter. It is better to give . . .

Make the Call !!

A few weeks ago, I received a message on LinkedIn from an HR peer. We had been connected for a few years since she attended the SHRM Annual Conference in Chicago. She was kind enough to attend one of my sessions and introduced herself at a book signing I did.

All of that is wonderful in itself. Her message tugged at my heart because she told me that she and her co-worker were getting burned out. She wondered if I had any ideas that could help her get inspired. She explained that they were just worn out.

Her name is Lauren, and she’s been connected to the HR Net forum since she attended the conference. I think it took courage to reach out to someone you barely knew to ask for help. So, I decided to call her.

I didn’t feel a return message on LinkedIn would do the trick. We set up a time, and I gave her a ring while on my commute home. I have a daily drive of 45 minutes to an hour to get to my office from my house.

When Lauren picked up, we talked as if we had known each other for years. I learned about her family because she was in the process of dropping off her son for soccer practice. I mentioned she didn’t have to chat if she was doing that. She replied that she didn’t want to miss this opportunity. I was humbled and a bit perplexed by that. I felt I was putting her out. He made it to practice easily, and we continued to talk.

We were able to talk the entire commute. I did give her ideas to consider, but mostly I wanted to encourage her. As a fellow HR practitioner, I understand that the work we do can be challenging, overwhelming, and draining. People are a mix of messy and wonderful (just like us). At times, HR can threaten to crush you if you allow the darkness to encompass you. I explained to Lauren that this conversation was the best possible use of my time. It made my day !! I also shared that I’d continue to check in with her to make sure she knew she had someone in her corner.

Too many HR people try to do the good work we do as if they’re on an island. That may be true inside your company, but it isn’t true in general. As humans, we were not designed to be alone. We are meant to be connected and together. I know that Lauren’s story and situation are far too common in our profession. The difference is that she took a chance to reach out.

When I got home, she texted me pictures of her kids, their Halloween costumes, and her wife. I was moved that she took my word on how important it is for us to make human connections with HR peers. Before I wrote this, I checked in to see how she was doing and asked if I could share our conversation. She gave me an update on how some things are getting better while she’s working on other things at the same time. She was geeked that I was going to share this.

This week, reach out. Give someone a call. Make sure you have at least one person in your corner. Trust me. When you do, you’ll see how much it makes your day !!