Tag: intentional

Practice Gratitude Daily

We just celebrated Thanksgiving this past week and it was wonderful. We had a small gathering of my wife and daughter. Our son just started a new job, so he couldn’t get away to travel home. We enjoyed a traditional feast of turkey and a multitude of sides including a batch of old-fashioned ambrosia salad !!

We took time to turn off all of our devices and screens so we could just focus on each other. It was perfect . . . as a moment in time. In the midst of all of the ongoing turmoil and challenges facing society and each person in some form or another, we gave thanks. It’s intriguing that we set aside one day in 365 to give thanks. One. Day. I’m not blind to the fact that some feel they can’t even enjoy this one day because of all that may be facing them.

It takes an effort to express gratitude. It seems to come naturally for some, but for most of us, there needs to be a defined focus to break through the muck and darkness that we continue to swim through. This is a shame because there is so much to be grateful for personally. We have a chance to be the light that breaks through the shadows people walk in, but it will cost you something. It’s the one thing that we feel is already scarce and fleeting each day. Our time.

It’s been proven that something becomes a habit if you practice it daily for at least 21 days. As small of a hurdle as this is, we perceive it to be an insurmountable mountain. There is no mountain. The obstacle is only the small voice in our head that says that we should be shackled to other things that “matter.” What if the action that “mattered” to you was expressing gratitude to others around you?

How would someone else’s day go if you said “Hello” and then actually stayed put to see how they’re doing? What would their day be like if you celebrated with them about an accomplishment in their family’s life? Would you see different outcomes in your interactions if you complimented and encouraged someone for their work and effort?

I think you know the answer to these questions because when someone else did this for you, it made your day brighter. How much “time” do questions and conversations like this take? We don’t even know because we either think doing this is daunting or a waste of our precious time. We couldn’t be more wrong.

Trust me on this. The time you spend investing in the lives of others is the most productive use of your time possible. It’s time to turn the tide of how people interact in our homes, our neighborhoods, and our workplaces. Instead of falling into the muck of negativity, pause, breathe and express gratitude about something, anything. Fight the urge to follow the surge of uncertainty and be an anchor of positivity as an alternative. It may give those you encounter the brief respite they needed and you didn’t even know it.

Daily gratitude isn’t about you. It’s about others. This week start a new habit that will be fulfilling in ways you can’t even yet fathom. Switch from setting aside one day per year to be thankful for everything, to practicing daily gratitude so that every day is filled with at least one grateful occurrence. See what happens . . .

Glad to Help

This past weekend our daughter made her first big adult purchase – a new car !! My wife and I drove up to be with her for support and advice if she needed it. We wanted to be there just in case things got challenging, but we expected her to be the decision-maker throughout the entire process. To say she was anxious and excited would be an understatement. It took about 30 minutes to drive from her apartment to the car dealership. That only made her anticipation grow even more. She felt she had prepared for every potential question and possibility.

As we arrived at the dealership, she boldly walked in and asked for Chris – who had been her contact for the past few months. He wasn’t there. She stammered and began to have a twinge of doubt about what she had envisioned as a perfect day. “But, I have an appointment at 11:00am.” The person who greeted us was so gracious and told us not to worry. She would make sure to get us someone to help with the car purchase. I could see her becoming nervous, but that soon changed. Enter Dave.

This young man came over directly to Melanie and said, “I understand you’re here to get a new car. I’m sorry Chris couldn’t be here. I’ll be glad to help you through this. It’s going to be a great day.” There was no pressure and he didn’t come across as being put off for having to fill in for Chris. In fact, he apologized for the mix-up and assured us over and over that everything was going to be fine. He was right. We were at the dealership for three hours !! However, it didn’t feel like it. The folks working were attentive, courteous, diligent and mindful. They kept us informed each step of the way from turning in her old car, to financing, to let us test drive the car before she made a final decision to whether we needed anything to drink. The entire process was excellent.

As we were going through everything, I sat back and watched as other potential customers came through the dealership. Each person was treated the same way and they either walked away being informed since they were “just looking” or they ordered a vehicle to get their process going. In fact, Dave took potential customers while also attending to our daughter.

During one of the many conversations throughout our time there, Dave explained they were short-staffed (like most employers these days). He stated over and over how much he appreciated our patience. We were all so impressed with the service that was given that it was easy to be patient. In the back of my mind though, I felt he thanked us because not every customer had been patient on other days. You could sense his relief.

That made me reflect on what is happening in the service industry today. You see, this hits home because I work for a restaurant chain that relies on the amazing frontline people in our locations, our manufacturing plant, and our call center. I hear countless stories of guests who lose their patience at the drop of a hat. It takes very little for some to yell, confront or walk away from an interaction when they came to enjoy a meal. If you read about how people who give service are experiencing work these days, this is becoming the norm and not the exception.

The difference today is that employees are willing to leave themselves instead of being treated poorly. That shouldn’t be surprising. No one wants to be treated poorly when they’re trying to genuinely meet a customer’s needs. Grace is being shown less and less and it’s affecting our workplaces.

We all can change this approach and we can do it immediately !! The experience we had with Dave should be an example of how to keep calm, assess the situation and see how to move forward. He stepped in and my daughter was grateful that he did. She didn’t bemoan the fact that her original contact had something come up. Life happens and there is SOOOOOOOO much more in life than having something take a different direction unexpectedly.

We need to remember that we leave an impression on every person we encounter every time we encounter them. Every. Time. That impact can be memorable in a positive way just as much as it can be in a negative way. Those who work in frontline roles don’t get to choose how you’re going to treat them. They experience things based on the choices you make.

This week start to keep in mind those who serve. They strive to do great work to take care of you. Thank them. Treat them well and let them know you value what they do. This should be true in your own organization and also with anyone you meet in other situations.

At the end of our time at the dealership, Melanie got her car and we ended up with an incredible experience. I plan to tell everyone about him and the good folks at Bill Estes Toyota. We’re thankful they were glad to help us and set an example of how workplaces and interactions can be all the time !!

A Little Respect

It seems that almost every conversation these days is tenuous. People are hesitant to talk to each other about the most mundane subjects because they’re concerned about the potential reaction they’ll receive. This has led to people becoming more and more separated. The separation in turn leads to very slanted opinions and people dig their heels in on whatever is being bantered about.

We need to be able to have opinions and we need to be able to share them. We learn from each other and hear many perspectives when people feel they can not only give their thoughts on topics but that they will be heard. I wish this were the case versus what is currently happening in society, on social media, and in the news in general. This constant edginess has eroded one component which could pull us together – respect.

In the workplace, we cannot let this erosion occur. We have to foster diversity of thought and varying viewpoints so that we experience collaboration and interconnectedness. This isn’t some Utopian encouragement. It needs to be the foundation and expectation of your employees. Respect each other and what each person brings to the table. People want to add value through their contributions in their roles. This is true at every level of the organization.

What are you seeing at your company? Do people respect one another? Are you aware of whether they are or aren’t?

We spend so much time trying to dictate behavior through programmatic efforts hoping that if people follow certain steps of a process, then collaboration will magically occur just “because.” We limit intentional interaction and relationship building because we believe the myth that productivity will be adversely reduced if people are spending too much time talking with each other.

HR has the opportunity to step in and create an environment and a culture that brings people together. By giving respect to each employee and acknowledging that their efforts make an impact and meaningful difference to the success of the company, you’ll find that you create engagement. It’s not something to measure. It’s something to practice. We can do this by giving people two things – our time and attention.

Honestly, that’s what every person wants more than anything each day. And yet, it’s what we struggle with more than any other aspect of our job. Isn’t it ironic that human interaction is where we spend the least amount of our time? We fall into the trap that time is being wasted when that just isn’t the truth.

This weekend I was fortunate to attend the retirement celebration of my wife’s boss who has worked in her role for 45 years. The night was wonderful because people came in from all over the country who had worked with her through the years to tell her congratulations and “Thank You.” When it came time to give speeches, each person talked about the unending impact she made by giving each person her time, attention and listening ear. They didn’t talk about her sage advice or visionary direction. She gave them respect and they now had a chance to show her how impactful that was.

She has always been a people person and when she took the podium the room fell silent. Through teary eyes, she thanked everyone and said, “You need to know that every one of you I worked with over this time mattered. Every. One.” She was overwhelmed and humbled by the turnout and the adulation.

You see she lived out the key to respect – In order to get respect, you need to give it first.

This coming week take a few moments to gauge where your time, focus and efforts are being spent. If it’s not investing your time in others, you’re just missing a chance to lay the groundwork of a culture that will be far more inviting, engaging and meaningful than what you’re experiencing now. Turn the tide of division and step into the gap to give respect to those around you. It works.

Trick or Treat ??

I took the past couple of weeks off from blogging. It wasn’t because I needed a break. I just didn’t have something to write about. Work had been moving along with a few bumps and things at home were good as well. Then, I hit a tough week. I mean every. single. day.

Nothing seemed to be falling into place. People around me were stressed for one reason or another. There was a heightened sense of urgency on some items that came up unexpectedly while other items that needed attention seemed to fade into the mist. For every good thing that happened (and they did), the countermove that followed seemed to create a deeper and deeper rut. It was unsettling because there was no reason for what was happening. You couldn’t step back and point to certain triggers or causes because each situation felt like it appeared out of nowhere. I was in a place I rarely find myself which was disconcerting.

I understand that ups and downs or ebbs and flows are natural. I’m grateful for those because they ensure variety occurs which everyone enjoys. We don’t want things to be mundane. If last week had followed this pattern, I would have felt that work was happening “normally.” These seismic waves of emotions that came up though were much more drastic than the regular high tides and low tides of work.

The question that you have to ask yourself when you experience these massive sways is – How should I respond?

This year Halloween falls on a Sunday and the last time that happened was in the year 2010 !! I enjoy the holiday and I especially love the kids who visit our house for candy. I’m a traditionalist and expect the kids to exclaim – “Trick or Treat !!” It’s always a treat for everyone who stops by and makes handing out candy so enjoyable.

Back to my rough week. Would I respond as if what I’m facing is a trick or treat? The natural urge is to quickly lash out emotionally because we think that a quick release will work. We think this reaction will at least get the ball of angst out hoping it will quickly dissipate and things can fall back into balance. It never works. Ever. Pulling a “trick” on others will give you a short high and a feeling of fulfillment as your vengeful action takes place. The fallout though will be far worse than the situation you’re facing.

You could also retreat and swallow the mix of emotions swirling around you. This response is as damaging as the vocal burst. People may think you’re doing well on the outside, but inside you’re dying. Putting up a facade may feel effective, but the situation you’re facing is still moving in full force. Stepping aside is more of a personal “trick” on yourself.

I’ve found the best course of action is two do two things – (1) Breathe and collect yourself and then (2) Intentionally move into all that is swirling around and take it on. I can’t guarantee the outcome will be positive, but it’s far more of a “treat” than other options. This is true for you personally AND it gives you an approach to teach others when they find themselves in the midst of their own rough weeks – which will happen.

You need to know that I followed my own advice. Even though I felt like I was being buried by an avalanche, I kept moving forward to not let things swallow me. I fought the strong urges to bellow at a few folks when I could sense it coming on. I also made myself shake off the small voice in my head that was encouraging me to just sit back because everything would work out.

I’m looking forward to this coming week. I don’t anticipate another rough week ahead, but it could happen. You never know. The reassurance that I have an approach I can rely on puts me at ease. I hope you follow this approach as well.

Fully Immersed !!

This past weekend my wife, daughter and I went to the Newfields Art Museum to take in the incredible digital experience featuring the artwork of Vincent Van Gogh. It took place in the LUME Indianapolis and it’s hard to adequately describe. You follow the crowd of people who are about to experience this with you. Slowly, you inch up three floors of escalators which only makes the anticipation of what is ahead grow. Your tickets are scanned on your phone and then you enter a vast expanse that covers almost an entire floor of the museum.Classical music starts to play and wrap around you as the first images come to life. The story of Van Gogh is displayed in words on various screens that tower over you. What is different with this art installation from any other I have experienced is that every surface is covered in color, imagery, and movement. Your eyes can’t keep up with all that is around you. The paintings of Van Gogh wrap around you and you are “inside” them. You see people take pictures of themselves fully covered in a mixture of blues, yellows, greens, whites, and reds. When his famous sunflowers come up people look like a field of wallpaper that blots out their outfits.

My family Van Gogh’d !!

The response of people as they took in all that was happening ranged from elation to disbelief to boredom. I hate to say that, but it’s like any experience. You can’t get everyone to enjoy what they’re going through. Some seemed like they were there for their partner/spouse and that support was appreciated even if they didn’t get lost in the art. My wife, daughter and I were lost completely. We didn’t even know the other person was in the room. I turned around to point something out and saw that they were taking in something that caught their attention. I didn’t want to shape or influence their experience. I knew we would share later what captured our attention.

One of the biographical pieces that came up on the screen was that Van Gogh was incredibly prolific and he created 2,000 drawings and pictures the last 10 years of his life. Keep in mind that he unfortunately only lived to be 37 years old. He also had mental health struggles in the midst of his immense creative output. It’s quite remarkable. It’s as if he couldn’t keep up with all that was flowing from him. He was as fully immersed in his art as much as we were surrounded by it at the exhibit.

His art is still so moving 130 years after his death. That is fascinating to comprehend. We wonder if the work we’re doing in HR sometimes has an impact at all, don’t we?

I think we can take a lesson from this exhibit and from the artist. If we would quit viewing ourselves as “practitioners,” we could take on the mantle of fully immersing ourselves in our profession, our roles and our organizations. Trust me when I tell you that when you see HR all around you, then you no longer see what you do as a job. I have tried to do this for years. It may seem a bit odd, but I think that every aspect of my life can be applied to the “art” I get to create as an HR professional.

This week, take a look at how you view what you do and how you see yourself. Are you only practicing HR? If so, pick up your brushes, find a canvas and immerse yourself. Don’t settle as an observer. Become the artist you were destined to be. You’ll be pleased at what starts to come to life !!

Don’t Be an Entertainer !!

If I was able to ask you how you’re doing as a human right now, how would you answer? I’m sure there would be a myriad of responses. Some would be genuine and some would be polite. Some would be in-depth and raw while others would be short and concise. There’s no telling what the answer could be, but it’s a question I think we should be asking on a more regular basis.

You see, I’m concerned. I’m concerned about my peers in HR who are plastering on a smiley face every day just to make it through. There are those who are not faking it and are intensely positive because it’s how they’re wired. I love when you encounter those folks, and I wish there were more people who adopted this approach to life and work. The reality is that people are struggling. There are varying degrees of what people are experiencing, but struggling is becoming far more the norm for everyone in the workplace – especially if you’re in HR.

The reason I feel it’s more prevalent in Human Resources professionals is that many don’t think they are allowed to be “human” themselves. We adopt an arm’s length facade to keep people from knowing who we are. We can show all of the necessary empathy and understanding for others, but rarely is that reciprocated back to HR pros. We’re expected to be the “entertainers” of the organization and it’s exasperating.

I’ve mentioned in the past that I’m a giant music freak and one of my favorite artists is the legendary Billy Joel. One of my favorite songs came from one of his earliest albums, Streetlife Serenade. It’s called “The Entertainer” and it captures exactly what I see happening in HR. The first verse goes like this . . .

“I am the entertainer
And I know just where I stand
Another serenader
And another long-haired band
Today I am your champion
I may have won your hearts
But I know the game
You’ll forget my name
And I won’t be here in another year
If I don’t stay on the charts, oh”

HR people always feel the pressure to be “on.” Trust me. We feel we need to “stay on the charts” if we’re to have any meaningful impact on the company. It’s true with everyone I know whether they’re a new practitioner just starting or a CHRO. It’s great that we are the “people” people in companies as long as we don’t express our humanity ourselves. This needs to stop. There’s never been a great reason for us to take this posture, and it honestly has distanced us within organizations.

It’s safe and okay to be vulnerable, flawed, quirky, uncertain, and curious. We can drop the guarded wall we put up and allow ourselves to be as emotional as every other person we work with. We can share our life experiences and our ups and downs. We can be frustrated and elated. However, we can’t experience that freedom if we keep holding on to the “entertainer” mantle.

We need to realize that employees today expect to have an HR connection that they can relate to. The days of being the compliance enforcer have evaporated. There continues to be a group of “experts” who pound the drum of processes/policies/procedures that should lead everything we do, but they’re wrong, old-fashioned and irrelevant.

With more and more organizations moving to a people-first approach, HR has to set the standard by being people first themselves. This is the expectation of how the workplace has evolved over the past twenty months. There isn’t going to be a retreat. It’s time to blaze the trail that awaits us. Stop being an entertainer and embrace being a human . . . in HR.

One last nugget. You can’t reference this incredible song without letting you enjoy it as well !! So, here you go.

Imprints

This past week, my wife and I were fortunate enough to get away for a vacation traversing across the great State of Tennessee. It was fantastic and I had some experiences that I was prepared to share in my blog, and then I received a text from a friend on Friday. The entire bottom of the world dropped as soon as I read it.

You see, my friend Mat Davies, passed away on Friday after a valiant fight against cancer. I sat in my hotel room and wept. I know this isn’t unique or new, but when it hits you personally you are reminded of how brief this adventure we call life really is.

Mat and I “met” via Twitter six years ago. I really enjoyed his blog and his activity on social media, so I decided to reach out to connect more. Thankfully he said yes. Again, this isn’t “unique”, but it was a chance to cross geographical boundaries because Mat was from the UK and I live in the States. I soon found out that we both had a fierce love for music of all genres and we connected even more. We communicated off and on throughout the years, but never in person.

That changed in 2019 when my wife and I went to the UK for an extended vacation. There was a Tweetup at Doggett’s Coat & Badge pub on the River Thames in London where tons of HR peers gathered to meet us in person. I spotted Mat immediately and made sure that we spent time together having a chat. Even though we had just “met” it felt like we had been friends for our entire life. He also was amazing by spending time talking to Debbie while I meandered around to make sure to meet everyone. Before the night ended, we made sure to capture the moment in a picture.

Me and Mat at the Tweetup on the Thames.

It is one of my favorite memories. Seriously. If you look at the picture, you can see rays of sunlight coming over Mat’s shoulder. That’s not a coincidence. He was always someone who brought joy, passion, wit and life to every conversation and interaction you had with him. Every. Time.

I have always believed that people leave an imprint on your life every time you encounter them. Those imprints can be positive or negative. Encouraging or frustrating. Uplifting and full of life or difficult and disheartening. You get the image. You leave an imprint on people whether you intentionally try to or not.

I don’t think we realize that we are in each other’s lives for a relatively short period of time. That’s true for the vast majority of people we know outside of our spouse/partner, parents, children and immediate family. We have moments. Since that is the case, we can choose to make an imprint that matters.

Mat knew this. He was someone who was positive, encouraging and thoughtful. Whenever we chatted during his chemo treatments, he was the one encouraging me and sharing some musical tidbit that he just enjoyed. I know he had to be struggling during his battle, but you’d never know it.

I know we can’t reach every person in the world. I also know that struggles, tragedies and challenges are in every person’s life to some degree. We can’t reach everybody BUT we can reach those we are fortunate to cross paths with.

I encourage you to model Mat and be a person whose imprint is not only positive, but it’s one that is lasting and meaningful. I hope to be someone who consistently follows this model. I already miss my friend, but I am thankful that we met. I carry his imprint with me . . . always.

I must do one thing to honor my friend by closing with a bit of music. I heard this just after hearing the news and it’s perfect because it’s a mix of the legend and artistry of Bob Dylan and the more current talented group Maroon 5 singing the classic “I Shall Be Released.” It fits because now my dear friend Mat is released from this life and to the next. Peace my brother.

Do Some Pruning !!

Last weekend I had a chance to head back to my hometown to visit with my mom. My wife and I always love traveling to Ada, Ohio because it’s honestly like stepping into a Hallmark movie. A small, midwestern town with a dedicated Main Street. It’s incorporated as a village because it’s not big enough to warrant other titles.

We went up not only to visit but to take in the 4th of July festivities !! My hometown hadn’t had fireworks for over 50 years and we got to experience this coming back. Even better, we watched them with our extended family in my cousin’s backyard. So very cool. We also heard the Lima Symphony Orchestra play an outdoor concert and it was spectacular to hear live music once again.

Those two things would have made the visit complete. However, I always make sure to see if there’s anything I can do for my mom around the house. It’s cathartic to be able to help her out and take care of some chores that she shouldn’t do as much anymore. She’s still very vibrant, active and engaged at 82 years young, but I don’t want her getting up and down ladders or doing more physical things when I can help. After cleaning the gutters, I went to the bigger task of the day – pruning.

My parents have always had great landscaping and curb appeal around their ranch-style house. So, we weren’t trying to work our way through a jungle of various plants. We were going to shape and prune some things to give them more definition and get them off the house and the siding. Also, cutting plants back allowed the sun and rain to reach smaller plants that surrounded the ones getting attention.

As I went to work with some electric shears on the first shrubbery, I noticed some overgrowth at the base of the plant that was honestly taking away nutrients from the main core of the bush. That needed to be pruned by hand. This is much slower, concentrated and meticulous. I had to crawl on the ground and reach up into the middle of various branches which poked and prodded every movement. After several well-placed cuts, the bush looked less frazzled and frayed. You could see the base of the beautiful shrub and it now was a focal point of the front corner of the house.

I continued working my way around the house with the hand pruners at the ready to give each plant some love and attention. It was wonderful to have some quiet time to myself and concentrate. As I was clipping and trimming, I began to see how the work I was doing was essential for the plant to thrive. Of course, it made me think of how this same action could be utilized in the workplace.

Pruning isn’t natural at work. We are far more focused on innovation, creativity and production. All movements are geared toward making more and more and more. It’s how we measure performance and how we reward and compensate people. We don’t feel we have time to ever step back and pause. It isn’t true, but we tell ourselves it is. With this incessant pace to always press ahead, work becomes misshapen, fragmented and unruly. We can’t keep up with all of the separate areas of growth. We need to be pruned!!

All of the benefits that I gave to my mom’s plants are true with work and people. If we cut back on some activities, then people can grow from their core and their strengths. If we untangle the things that pull at our base and foundation, then our people can stand firm and assured in what they do. Also, if we pull things back in line, we may see other people who have been overshadowed and need some light and nourishment themselves.

As HR pros, we would benefit our organization if we were those who recognized and made sure pruning happens. I’m not talking about reducing the size of your workforce. I’m talking about being the gardeners who see when things need more attention, care and some clipping. Doing this helps those that lead people to see the need for ALWAYS being mindful of their people.

This week get the pruners out and move around the office to see where your handiwork may reshape people in order for them to blossom, thrive and grow with purpose !!

Being a Dad

It’s Father’s Day once again. This can bring up a variety of memories for people. I know that not everyone has had a great relationship with their father. I’m fortunate because the experience with my fathers has been great for different reasons and for different periods of time. In the past, I’ve written about my biological dad who passed away when I was only four years old. I’ve also been able to capture the amazing time I had with my “stepdad” who was around for the majority of my life who passed away at the end of 2020. This year I wanted to share my reflections about being a dad.

I’ve been a dad for over 27 years now. My wife and I have two wonderful kids who are now adults – Melanie and Josh. I don’t take it for granted that we fit into the stereotypical nuclear family model. We have had far more ups than downs. Please understand that doesn’t mean we haven’t had our struggles, arguments, and disagreements over the years. It’s intriguing to me that when people share experiences that are positive, it’s met with skepticism and critique. There’s this insinuation that there must be something else that just isn’t being shared. Sorry to disappoint.

I love being a dad. It is probably the “work” that I value more than any other personal accomplishment I’ve been able to have. You see, I want my kids to know that they are loved just as they are and through whatever they face. I want to be the dad who laughs with them and holds them when things get emotional. I want to listen so that they are heard, and offer solutions only if they ask for options. It gives me great joy to celebrate with them when they have new life experiences. And, it touches me deeply when they contact me for advice.

You see, the most important thing I get to do is to be a model for them. They’ve seen when I’ve been loving and affectionate with my wife and with them. They’ve also witnessed when I’ve failed them and others. At times they’ve heard me yell at something I thought mattered SOOOOOO much when it usually didn’t. I’ve always strived to be genuine, vulnerable, and transparent with them. I cherish when they make fun of me when I tear up at a TV commercial. They eagerly wait to pounce on the first senseless tear and howl with glee when it happens (which is often.)

I love seeing them grow up to learn about life. I want to jump in and take care of everything, but know that I need to step back so they learn from life just like my dad did for me. I make sure to check in on them often to hear what’s happening in their corner of the world while also sharing what’s happening in mine. I share my faith, my successes, and my frustrations. We jostle over politics, social issues, and musical tastes.

They have always known that I’m the dad who was willing to jump in, be goofy, and make sure their friends always felt our house was a second home for them. I continue to strive to be the dad who encourages and takes interest in the people in their lives. I want to be the dad who can’t wait to see the next Marvel movie or ride the scary amusement park ride with them.

I know that this may sound sappy and sentimental (and I’m cool with that in so many ways.) I wouldn’t trade a second of the time I’ve been a dad. Not one. I look forward to growing old and staying an intricate part of their lives whatever comes. I don’t have a set of goals for them to meet or unreal expectations to measure whether they’ve “made it” or not.

It’s just a privilege to be a dad. I love it !!

Thread People

Did you know that my wife is amazing ?? It’s true. Not only because she’s been my better half for nearly 32 years (in October of this year), but she balances me in a way few others do. She always nudges me every Saturday to make sure I write a blog post on Sunday. How freaking cool is that ??!! Then, she coyly says, “Do you need me to give you an idea again this week?” She giggles and continues. “You know, you rely on me for these ideas EVERY week.” I roll my eyes and we laugh. She’s the best.

This week SHE is the theme behind my post. Debbie is unique in today’s workforce. She’s held two jobs during her career. Two. Her first role lasted 15 years and has been at her “current” employer for 21 years. What’s even more astonishing is that we were talking about her boss who is retiring after . . . 45 years !! (I’ll wait until you get back up off the floor from shock.) So, to help you with some HR math, Debbie’s boss Gilda was at their employer for 24 years before Debbie joined. Astounding !!

During their time they have seen turnover in leadership and coworkers. People have come and gone. Some moved up into greater roles and others were at the company for a relatively short period of time. There were those who moved voluntarily for new opportunities at other companies or locations by moving out of the area. Some were asked to leave. This occurs at every company. The regular movement and mobility in companies aren’t unique.

However, Gilda and Debbie represent something that is too often overlooked and taken for granted in organizations. They’re thread people. They’re the employees who provide stability, continuity, and reassurance which is vital to a healthy culture. Please note, I’m not talking about tenure on its own. That is valuable, but it doesn’t automatically translate that long-term employees are performing/productive employees. It does in many cases, but being a reliable thread that is woven throughout a company is far different.

The reality of those who provide consistency is that they are such an integral part of a company’s fabric. You need to make sure you have those who fill roles that are threads. People in these roles should be valued in a way that is celebrated. If you can go to someone who is a fountain of knowledge, is approachable, willing and capable of helping you, you should be grateful. They make work seem seamless and they make sure you don’t have nearly as many obstacles in your way to perform your job.

So often, we focus on those we deem high potentials (don’t get me started on this myth) or senior leadership. We get enamored with people who are the most visible, vocal and charismatic. They are bright, shiny objects who demand our attention. They are the subject of interoffice conversations. We feel they’re going to represent our companies future. We’re just sure of it !!

Then we see that this hi-po, or that one, finds a new role in a different company. We question whether they were loyal or not and the sparkle seems to dim quite a bit. Or, someone gets chosen to go into a larger role without support and infrastructure to help them thrive. They were “anointed” and . . . it fails. We aren’t taking the time to develop people to move into roles. That takes too much time and effort. (Can you feel the sarcasm ??)

During these various shifts and staff movements, threads quietly keep being added to the company. These wonderful folks roll with every change and new face they work with and keep doing the work that sits behind the curtain. They aren’t the subject of interoffice conversations, and yet they remain constant.

It’s time for us to get our head out of the clouds watching and paying attention to the employees who may/may not grow and advance. We should have a consistent development program that tests the capability, willingness, approachability, and capacity of EVERY employee !! See how everyone contributes and performs. Make sure that each person is included, valued, and given credit for how they move the company forward.

This week thank those incredible thread people who keep your company afloat and functioning. They deserve it every day.